Natalie Haynes



Profile:
Full name: Natalie Haynes

Area of interest: Contemporary lifestyle and current events

Journals: The Times

Email: [mailto:natalie@nataliehaynes.com]

Website/blog: NatalieHaynes.com

Agent: Comedy CV



Biography:
Education:

Career: Radio, TV, journalism, live shows

Current position: Stand-up comedian, journalist, author

Other posts: Columnist

Viewpoints/Insight:


 * Meet the Author: Natalie Haynes (video)
 * More 4 - Starkey's Last Word Natalie Haynes defends anti-animal testing views, Professor Steve Jones gives the medical side (Video) December 2005
 * Interview: Fast talking Natalie is falling for Dick Van Dyke, News Letter, Belfast, 18th January 2007

TV/Radio: info

Controversy/Criticism:

Books:

Latest work: The Great Escape (London: Simon & Schuster Children's, 2007) OCLC 137313413

Awards/Honours:

Other:

Speaking/Appearances: Upcoming gigs



The Times:
Column remit: "She thought about what worried her in everyday life, and pondered the problems that seemed to beset the society in which we live" - from Natalie's website, describing her show, Watching The Detectives

Section: Features

Role: Columnist

Pen-name:

Email: natalie@nataliehaynes.com

Website: Timesonline / Guest contributors

Commissioning editor:

Day published: Saturday or Monday

Regularity: Two or three times per month

Column format:

Average length: 800 words



Articles:

 * wedding was fab. I didn’t have to go'' - I don’t like small talk with strangers, I don’t like wearing fancy shoes and I don’t like sitting at a table with people I don’t know - 2nd August 2010
 * student sets up hit website. What’s so wrong?'' - The last UCL graduate to make the news was the Pants Bomber - 1st June 2010
 * trousers are a crime – but only against fashion'' - If you are mugged by a wearer, how fast will he be able to run? - 6th May 2010
 * less fruit will mean there are fewer broken arms'' - Ginger nuts are a biscuit and a vegetable. That counts as a win - 8th April 2010
 * you thinking of putting money into an Isa? Think again'' - Banks reward the fickle and penalise the loyal — interest rates suddenly drop after a year in one of these investments - 1st April 2010
 * things are better lost in translation'' - Google’s innovation is a new speech impediment - 8th February 2010
 * should give stars a sporting chance'' - Bankers may not be able to walk away but runners can chose not to race in London - 18th January 2010
 * Avatar is still a turkey'' - Sci-fi fans should know that any time a race of aliens has an apostrophe in their name is a time to worry - 29th December 2009
 * movie repeats are a great festive ritual'' - Miracle on 34th Street, It’s a Wonderful Life, even Gremlins: their annual return into our living rooms is comforting - 24th December 2009
 * smell a rat in our concern for this rodent'' - If showbiz animals can’t be eaten, I’ll train up some Christmas turkeys - 8th December 2009
 * perfect day to buy Christmas presents'' - December 7 is the busiest day for online retailers. I’ll play my part . . . - 5th December 2009
 * can be poor and not overdrawn, you know'' - Why do we expect to borrow money from banks without asking? - 26th November 2009
 * love vampires. We’re only human'' - Today’s fang-baring bloodsucker is more a Jane Austen romantic hero than a Hammer horror villain - 19th November 2009
 * never escapes politics'' - Democracy and entertainment have been inextricably linked since Ancient Greece - 4th October 2009
 * you can do Christmas even if you don’t do God'' - Atheists are shaking off their joyless image and trying to put forward a positive face. But most of all they just want to have fun - 1st October 2009
 * post a day has become a distant memory'' - These strikes are driving people like me away from the Royal Mail - 18th September 2009
 * riddance to frosted light bulbs'' - I’ve just looked at my electricity bill. It’s a miracle - 1st September 2009
 * your NHS records to stay private? Good luck'' - If you don’t want your health records stored online, you may have some trouble finding the 'opt out' section - 20th August 2009
 * is hell. But on screen it should be fun'' - In Tarantino’s new movie, a whole genre is back on form - 13th August 2009
 * the new generation can’t stand up'' - Once Edinburgh in August was the only place for a young comic to be. Now it just costs too much - 6th August 2009
 * power has given 118800 a bloody nose'' - What is especially interesting about this exercise of people power is that no one seems to have seen it coming - 18th July 2009
 * ‘Adults only’ should mean more than porn'' - The decision to reclassify certain films strikes a blow for grown-ups. Not all movies or books have to be child-friendly - 17th June 2009
 * Trek is still boldly going with the important issues'' - If you want real artistic radicalism, tune into sci-fi - 9th May 2009
 * shall we do with the captured pirate?'' - The story of Captain Richard Phillips is more like an action movie. I blame Johnny Depp - 14th April
 * can't tell April Fool's stories from real ones'' - Have a read of any decent news website and there's the evidence - 1st April 2009
 * love that dare not show itself'' - The Damned United features that rare thing - two men locked in a passionate emotional friendship - 20th March 2009
 * £40 treats kept the economy going'' - The small spending of small shareholders is essential to recovery - 17th February 2009
 * Titus reborn'' - There are ancient and modern parallels wherever you look, starting with Barack Obama - 20th January 2009
 * aren't doing their customers a favour'' - Leap-second resolutions for the retail industry - 1st January 2009
 * alternative Christmas carol service'' - An order of service for a non-religious celebration - 18th December 2008
 * earn virtually no interest, but inflation is 4.5%'' - I am being kicked in the teeth for being a careful saver - 5th December 2008
 * rule: don't mock the weak'' - A joke is a delicate balancing act, as Russell Brand and Jonathan Ross's ill-judged prank shows - 29th October 2008



More links:
NatalieHaynes links Wikipedia bio