Matthew Norman



Profile:
Full name: Matthew Norman

Area of interest: Politics, Media, Sport

Journals/Organisation: The Independent | The Daily Telegraph | Evening Standard

Email: [mailto:m.norman@independent.co.uk m.norman@independent.co.uk]

Personal website:

Website: http://www.independent.co.uk/opinion/commentators/matthew-norman | http://www.telegraph.co.uk/comment/columnists/matthew-norman

Blog:

Representation: http://www.curtisbrown.co.uk/matthew-norman

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Biography:
About: http://www.curtisbrown.co.uk/matthew-norman

Education:

Career: Evening Standard: journalist, columnist; Daily Mirror: columnist; The Guardian: political diarist, 1995/2004; The Sunday Telegraph: sports columnist, 2005/2006; Evening Standard: sports columnist, 2006/2010; The Independent: political and media columnist, 2004- ; Joined the Daily Telegraph in 2010 as restaurant critic, also writes on politics an media Current position/role: The Independent: Political and Media columnist; Daily Telegraph: Restaurant critic, politics and media commentator


 * also writes/written for: The Guardian: Restaurant critic (archive)

Other roles/Main role: The Spectator: contributing editor, 2006-

Other activities:

Disclosures:

Viewpoints/Insight: This is my last Diary, and after nine years you will readily imagine the agonised internal debate that has raged as to how to say farewell - The Guardian, 11th June 2004

Broadcast media:

Video:

Controversy/Criticism: Spurs ban Standard, by Steve Cording, Evening Standard, 28th August 2007

Awards/Honours: British Press Awards Columnist of the Year, 2008

Scoops:

Other: Married to Rebecca Tyrrel and is a feature of her column 'Days like those'; A lifelong Spurs fan



Books & Debate:


Latest work:

Speaking/Appearances: http://www.jla.co.uk/after-dinner-speakers/matthew-norman

Debate: 

The Daily Telegraph:
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Articles: 2014

 * Insulting 'disloyal’ Andy Murray is disgusting - Spiteful attacks on our top tennis player help explain why many Scots voted Yes - 20th September
 * Airport misery: the airlines just don't seem to care - Even worse than the delays is the companies' apparent indifference to their passengers’ travails - 2nd August
 * My foxes are shot, and so is my conscience - As soon as I heard the rifle crack, the guilt of the liberal townie came flooding through me - 26th July
 * Actually Mr President, I’m Ed, not David Miliband - The Labour leader’s trip to America is bound to be humiliating - 19th July
 * We've blown the whistle on our old rivalries - Our traditional footballing enemies will once again face each other in a World Cup final. But this time, bad feeling has turned into admiration - 13th July
 * Jimmy Savile: The Praetorian Guard that let evil do its worst - Wilful blindness by our great institutions let Jimmy Savile continue his abusive rampage - 28th June
 * World Cup 2014: Lions, donkeys and a refusal to face facts - England’s failure, yet again, should surprise no one with even a scant grasp of history - 21st June
 * World Cup 2014: England fans should dream of glory, however painful will be the disappointment - History and experience count against Roy Hodgson's men but that should not stop us from aiming high this weekend - 14th June
 * Surely poor David Moyes has suffered enough - It’s no good having £7 million in the bank if the trade-off is a life in the public stocks - 24th May
 * Don’t be a nervous nellie, David Cameron – debate! - A digital head-to-head might just engage hip young people who are left cold by politics - 17th May
 * The Axe faces his toughest challenge yet with Ed - Getting Obama elected (twice) was the easy part for Ed Miliband’s new political strategist - 19th April
 * We all share in the shame of Hillsborough - Twenty-five years on, we must not forget the disgraceful treatment of a city and its people - 12th April
 * Our Minister for Mediocrity is going nowhere - It shouldn’t take 32 seconds to work out that being useless is no bar to a Cabinet post - 5th April
 * Too many Brits are not pulling their weight - Fat is the new normal, so if M&S mannequins make you feel small, it’s time to bulk up - 29th March
 * Bingo! Shappsy sets the Tories back decades - The party chairman’s Budget tweet was just like a remark from a PG Wodehouse character - 22nd March
 * Pity Tony Blair, disowned even by his heir - The Prime Minister’s imitation of St Peter was the final nail in his predecessor’s coffin - 15th March
 * Alex Ferguson, the Citizen Kane of football - In retirement, the great manager has revealed the bloody truth about his personal 'Rosebud’ - 2nd March
 * Oh, how we will miss this bedlam on ice - It’s not the sport, but the craziness, that lends the Winter Games their glorious appeal - 22nd February
 * Kevin Pietersen: the personification of prathood and genius - The ousted cricketer let his ego get in the way - 8th February
 * Is the PM losing the plot – or rewriting history? - The dividing line between fact and fiction has always been rather elusive at Westminster - 31st January
 * The final lap for Bernie Ecclestone, the Great Dictator of Formula One? - Bernie Ecclestone is a great survivor – but a $44 million bribery charge in Bavaria could be his undoing - 18th January
 * Norwich City playing game of life or death in battle to avoid relegation from Premier League - Threat from Norfolk club’s chief executive to end his days if they drop back into the Championship beyond the call of duty - 17th January



Articles: 2013

 * Stepping on Strictly’s toes is political suicide - Ersatz glamour and guilty pleasure combine in a show that comes close to TV perfection - 21st December
 * Fifty shades of growing old and grey - Like Hollywood’s top three actors, Matthew Norman found himself facing 50 – and knew he had to finally take action - 14th December
 * Pity the Bitcoin miner dumped on by fate  - It’s hard not to feel for the IT worker who foolishly slung away an outrageous fortune - 30th November
 * Forget cricket, let’s stick to what we do best - After our collapse in the Ashes, an Englishman’s thoughts naturally turn to alternative pursuits - 23rd November
 * Rob Ford is digging his way from infamy to celebrity - Reality shows, public appearances, commercial endorsements: that's the way it goes for someone who’s captured the headlines - 20th November
 * A proper GP can be a pain in the wallet - If we want to bring back the days of real family doctors, then someone has to pay - 16th November
 * Fed up with life on hold? Just call Trevor - After hanging on in limbo land for 37 minutes, I found a way to get my own back - 9th November
 * A secret will always fester in the darkness - Deploying the Privy Council to stifle open debate is symptomatic of a national obsession - 2nd November
 * If only I’d given Clegg the beating he needed - My failure to discipline my schoolboy 'toast fag’ properly surely cost this country dear - 26th October
 * Boris and George, a pair of Chinese characters - Watching the duo suck up to the hosts and fight for our attention at home made for excruciating viewing - 19th October
 * Adam Afriyie, the first man of Tory self-sacrifice - By reopening the EU debate, Afriyie has achieved the impossible – a united party - 12th October
 * You’ll soon be able to buy that AK47 again - The FBI has closed one secret online market, but another is bound to open - 5th October
 * Finally, Michelin shows signs of good taste - The Guide has realised that eating out should be a joyful experience, not a quasi-religious rite - 28th September
 * Why did we tolerate this putrid nonsense? - New Labour achieved little, but its feuding left a stain on a great democracy - 21st September
 * How MPs could avoid the trouble and strife - Employing the missus at Westminster would be a lot less attractive with these simple rules - 14th September
 * When it comes to faking it, Britain leads the world - We used to get our way by acting dim, but now the trick is to know little yet sound smart - 7th September
 * Let’s hear it for the PM’s Mickey Mouse look - Unlike his predecessors, Mr Cameron comes across as the British everyman on holiday - 24th August
 * Don’t be fooled by Stuart Wheeler’s poker face - The Ukip treasurer is just the companion a lady would need when the chips are down - 17th August
 * Come in, Agent Dawkins, your job is done - There can be no doubt, after his latest outburst, that the arch-atheist is doing the Lord’s work - 10th August
 * A new Doctor Who, but the same old moral core - The 12th Time Lord will inherit a show of unique resilience and enduring values - 3rd August
 * Doughnuts are the key to falling crime - New crime figures pose the question: would we be safer without the police - 20th July
 * We didn’t budget for the Chancellor’s bracelet - With a gadget on his wrist and a smile on his face, the new Osborne is a great improvement - 13th July
 * Greedy MPs unleash my inner Guy Fawkes - As the expenses scandal rumbles on, what better time to watch my favourite disaster film - 6th July
 * Here’s how to rescue Australia - England needs to throw the Ashes to help Australia - 15th June
 * Not superhuman Obama, just a naughty boy - The US President has given in to the murky demands of power - 8th June
 * Fiendish plots are a-hatching in Watford - It's joy for conspiracy theorists as the Bilderberg Group meets again - 1st June
 * Garcia isn’t the sharpest wedge in the bag - A crass invitation to dinner shows how international golf is stuck in the dark ages - 25th May
 * One tall poppy we haven’t cut down to size - David Beckham’s charm, politeness and good grace allow him to defy celebrity norms - 18th May
 * A modern medieval warlord - Sir Alex Ferguson's achievements transcend his sport - 11th May
 * Cell door must shut on Stuart Hall - When Hall's fate is decided, the passage of time should play no part - 4th May
 * Benyon’s best-by date is surely behind him - Taking austerity advice from an MP is never easy, especially when he’s worth £110 million - 27th April
 * Chuka Umunna is victim of a vile stitch-up - The Labour MP was shocked – shocked! – to discover his Wikipedia entry had been doctored - 13th April
 * A city made for David Miliband and his Big Cool Friends - Ed Miliband's big brother will find settling into the Big Apple easy – and could even surprise us all - 30th March
 * Fetch me a wet fish for George Osborne and Ed Balls - The solution to our malaise is blindingly obvious, and it would be worth every penny - 23rd March
 * The Honourable boozers who lower the bar - The sorry saga of Eric Joyce may call time on the folly of cheap alcohol at Westminster - 16th March
 * What ho! Here comes a literary challenge - If Sebastian Faulks can introduce PG Wodehouse to a new generation he deserves a medal - 9th March
 * The acrostic offender begins his sentence - All may not be lost for Mark Dunning, the headmaster of Orley Farm prep school in Harrow, who was fired over a coded insult in his newsletter - 2nd March
 * Al-Qaeda terrorism in Britain: Give thanks for the three stooges of Sparkhill - It’s impossible not to laugh at the bungling jihadis – but we won’t always be so lucky - 23rd February
 * A close encounter with South Africa’s demons - At first all the security seemed overblown – then came the claxon in the middle of the night - 16th February
 * It’s Britain that is in need of overseas aid - Don’t stop at the Bank of England – most of our institutions could do with a foreign touch - 9th February
 * Sorry, but Adam Afriyie - Britain’s Barack Obama - never had a hope - The would-be prime minister-in-waiting and Conservative messiah is licking his wounds - 2nd February
 * I told you I was ill – and now it’s serious - Not only is man flu real, but the hypochondriac faces a new vista of health-related terror - 26th January
 * You never catch me outsource work to China - US software writer pay China person do job for him. Trusty UK journalist not like that - 19th January



Articles: 2012

 * 2012: Matthew Norman's Review of the Year - It began and ended with near-biblical drought and floods, and had its share of scandals. But the glorious Diamond Jubilee and Olympics lit up Britain, leaving us feeling a lot sunnier - 29th December
 * Is there a problem, Culture Secretary Maria Miller? Er, um, sort of. . . - The Culture Secretary was a PR queen before entering Parliament – and doesn’t it just show - 15th December
 * Just magic from The Apprentice’s sorcerers - Gravitas, dazzling wit, and crazy hair – Sugar vs Trump is a defining battle of our era - 8th December
 * What’s the verdict on Flavia’s samba, Brian? - A glittering TV career surely awaits Lord Justice Leveson, our hottest judicial pin-up - 1st December
 * Is it Debrettiquette to toss this guide away? - The arbiters of modern manners have come a cropper with their silly advice on fast food - 23rd November
 * Nadine Dorries v Louise Mensch: it’s a war for the Tory soul - The showdown between two Conservative women is about class, celebrity and survival - 17th November
 * When the bookies didn’t have a prayer - If men of the cloth can’t gain an edge from a little inside knowledge, then Lord help us -10th November
 * Football is still a black and white affair - Despite its supposed gentrification, the sport remains a garbage can of racist thuggery - 3rd November
 * A sad farewell to the Goebbels of the Gorbals - Alastair Campbell will be very happy to see the back of The Thick of It's Malcolm Tucker - 27th October
 * Pity the MPs who know not what they claim - If only there had been a kind of precedent – an expenses scandal, say – to guide the poor lambs - 20th October
 * EU wins Nobel Peace Prize: Who, me? Little old me? I never thought. . . - As a European, I’m delighted to accept my Nobel prize – now where do I pick up my 0.0016p? - 13th October
 * When masterful Mittens Romney took the gloves off - Romney’s astonishing transformation leaves Obama searching for his inner Lex Luthor - 6th October
 * Labour’s half-time lead counts for nothing - It’s no good defending – Miliband must bring an old star off the bench to secure victory - 29th September
 * Coming through. . . the arrogance of power - Andrew Mitchell can apologise all he wants, but he’s done his bit to retoxify the Tory brand - 22nd September
 * Why are male drivers always boy racers at heart? - Something terrible happens in the male psyche when installed behind a steering wheel - 14th September
 * Cabinet reshuffle: I feel sorry for the guy who does the firing - If David Cameron really had boozed his way through the reshuffle, it would be hard to blame him - 9th September
 * We’re always ready to relive those Smash hits - Britons are never happier than when they are asked to indulge in a little light nostalgia - 1st September
 * There’s nothing gentle about indoor games - Pupils hoping for the easy life after Gove’s playing field sell-off should think again - 18th August
 * Why the BBC needs better pundits - Foreign pundits show the BBC how this important post-game sector should be done - 11th August
 * When the truth is obscured by tears of pride - There’s a thin line between patriotic fervour and the darker side of nationalism - 4th August
 * Go on, take the plunge and enjoy - Once a curmudgeon about the Olympics, Matthew Norman has learnt to love everything about the Games – winners and losers, athletes big and small - 28th July
 * Who could fail to fall for sweet, gentle Bashy? - The touching love story of Syria’s First Couple is crying out for the Hollywood treatment - 21st July
 * We’re still treating Private Tommy Atkins with contempt - The use of soldiers for Olympic security is an indignity these brave men don’t deserve - 14th July
 * The Olympics: time to start praying - Apart from the security mess, the M4 closing and Heathrow chaos, what else might go wrong - 13th July
 * Not a dream on the M6, a nightmare - Police reaction to the M6 bus incident was absurd - 7th July
 * Secret ingredients of the Country Supper - Perhaps one day, when all this is over, Becky and Dave will shed light on the great mystery - 16th June
 * England's fantasy football has had its day - Hodgson’s boys go to Euro 2012 without hope or fanfare – so let’s be gracious in defeat - 9th June
 * Please grow up, you pygmies - Hopeless, feckless, incompetent...what are our politicians doing - 2nd June
 * We public schoolboys need a good beating - The privately educated dominate modern Britain - 12th May
 * The last days of Victor bin Laden - Osama bin Laden became an irrelevance - 5th May
 * It’s a poor field in the Under-a-Bus Stakes - The Tories tipped for the top job are pulling up lame - 28th April
 * Simon Cowell has only one true love - himself - Why does the hollow, narcissistic king of karaoke have such a hold over our lives - 21st April
 * A last hurrah for the Aintree cavalry charge - Today’s Grand National is the end of an era - 14th April
 * All Dave’s problems gone, in a puff of smoke - The shutters are coming down over cigarette displays, we shall not see them lit again - 7th April
 * Let the quality take care of the yeomanry - Let the PM and his cronies suffer with us - 24th March
 * We can feel the love, Mr President, but why? - Whenever a president woos a PM it can only be bad news for Britain - 17th March
 * Cameron is heading to a no-horse town - A trip to the US will be a welcome break – and the PM might be able to do Obama a big favour - 10th March
 * The PM will forever be saddled with Raisa - David Cameron's confession rekindles all the old questions about his judgment of people - 3rd March
 * Wild times on the stump with Mayor Frank Carson - After 10 solid hours, the comic’s overgrown schoolboy daftness was no laughing matter - 25th February
 * Will love blossom in Chris Huhne's courtroom drama? - The scenes between Chris Huhne and his ex-wife are worthy of Noel Coward at his best - 18th February
 * David Miliband: the sniping and self-pity of a truly feeble man - The best thing that David Miliband could do for the Labour Party would be to shut up - 4th February
 * Help! Heston Blumenthal is in my kitchen - Chemist of the kitchen – of blow torch and foam fame – has a new book packed with recipes for home cooking - 27th January
 * A first, with honours, for the student who rejected Oxbridge - Elly Nowell is an inspiration to those who never made it to the dreaming spires - 21st January
 * A close-up of Richard Desmond that I wasn’t ready for - I worried for the mental welfare of one participant in the Leveson Inquiry - 14th January



Articles: 2011

 * review of the year (and a few predictions for 2012)'' - 2011 was crammed with a decade’s worth of news - 31st December
 * Hanky-panky with The Swinging Krankies - No wonder things were fan-dabi-dozi for the children’s duo with a decidedly kinky side - 24th December
 * Europe's crisis is playing out like a French farce - George Osborne, David Cameron and Christian Noyer have big roles in the pantomime of eurozone politics - 17th December
 * US election: Newt-fancying is fun, but best enjoyed on this side of the Pond - The Republicans could yet pick Newt Gingrich as their presidential candidate - 10th December
 * Where men go to shed their inhibitions - We can be ourselves in that sanctuary at the bottom of the garden - 3rd December
 * Our national treasures are naughty, not nice - Forget Sir David Attenborough and Stephen Fry - Fred Goodwin is the man who best defines modern Britain - 26th November
 * Lunch for two with some Twitter on the side - Will we restaurant critics ever be able to dine again without donning heavy disguise - 19th November
 * How the modern Thatcher broke my heart - Louise Mensch was the perfect politico – until she made a startling confession to James Murdoch - 12th November
 * Sir Jeremy breaks a butterfly upon a wheel - Where was the Christian clemency behind the decision to jail Pakistan cricketer Mohammad Amir - 5th November
 * A world at the mercy of irrelevant pygmies - Gone are the statesmen of stature – today’s leaders are a motley set of lechers and buffoons - 29th October
 * Gervais - the new Woody Allen or a bore? - Ricky Gervais is in danger of turning into a bad parody of his greatest creation - 24th October
 * Wayne Rooney is more of a hero than ever - With England’s star player on the sidelines, we will be spared our usual bout of delusion - 15th October
 * Rory Bremner's in 'Strictly' because no one will lead - Matthew Norman explains why Rory Bremner is reduced to hoofing on 'Strictly' - 8th October
 * take more than a sudden northern accent to make Yvette Cooper into a potential prime minister'' - Labour's shadow home secretary's status as front runner to succeed Ed Miliband is acknowledged by bookies, commentators, and even by her adorable husband Ed Balls - 1st October
 * Why sport needs naughtiness and intrigue - Finding unorthodox ways to win has been a mark of competition through the ages - 24th September
 * It’s all right now... a Kinnock has won at last - The Welsh windbag’s Danish daughter-in-law appears to have learnt from his mistakes - 17th September
 * Tony Blair proves God has a sense of humour - His role on the banks of the Jordan as godfather to Rupert Murdoch's daughter Grace is just one of the things that make Tony Blair a great global comedy figure - 10th September
 * better just to laugh at Ken than retaliate'' - The funniest thing about London's former mayor is that he can’t stop mentioning the war - 20th August
 * calm and carry on as financial crisis looms'' - The ominous rumbling of an impending economic meltdown has echoes of the 'phoney war’ of 1939-40 - 6th August
 * is not the time for a pacifist President'' - If America's debt crisis is not solved in Congress, Barack Obama must take a tip from Morgan Freeman in Deep Impact and deploy the nuclear option - 30th July
 * Freud: from spiteful schoolboy to super-schmoozer'' - Matthew Freud wasn’t always this charming and well-connected, but he intends to remain so - 23rd July
 * good, the bad and the downright thick'' - Andy Hayman has shown that you don’t have to be stupid to be a policeman, but it helps - 16th July
 * will satisfy our lust for scandal now?'' - The News of the World was a gloriously vulgar and grubby part of Britain’s cultural heritage - 9th July
 * there’s only one way out of this mess'' - We would like to wish Mr Bourne every happiness. But what would be the point - 2nd July
 * a rare beast at the Westminster circus'' - Mark Pritchard gave no thought to his career when he took on the might of the Tory party - 25th June
 * sorry plot was more Trabant than Volvo'' - Never mind the plotters’ disloyalty – it’s the total lack of judgment that is truly disturbing - 11th June
 * how are you spending your final hours?'' - The end of the world is predicted for today, so you'd better read this as fast as you can - 21st May
 * be raising a glass to Delia the deity'' - How can anyone resist Delia Smith after the cook and football fan's latest spirited display - 14th May
 * in God’s name gave him that idea?'' - The Archbishop of Canterbury’s new kindness law would have some unkind results - 23rd April
 * Y word goes from amusing to abusing'' - The self-mocking nickname of Spurs fans, Jew and gentile alike, is no longer a joke - 16th April
 * just can’t see Berlusconi flying Ryanair'' - Compared with the comic turns in other countries, our leaders seem such a dull lot - 9th April
 * cliff-top conversion of Jeremy Clarkson'' - Top Gear’s presenter discovers his health and safety side after someone takes a fence - 2nd April
 * police have become a law unto themselves'' - Senior officers have created a powerful trade union that no one dares take on - 25th March
 * let the Blairs' coitus be interruptus'' - The Blairs bragging about their nocturnal athletics is one of life's certainties - 19th March
 * Hunt: off to a flier, but can he go the distance?'' - He’s smart, smooth and Murdoch’s best friend – yes, the Culture Secretary is bound for the top - 5th March
 * PCs open a window of opportunity'' - Imaginative cheating can be a useful marker for success in later life - 26th February
 * Alternative Vote: this is my kind of miserable little compromise'' - AV isn't much, but it's better than what we've got - 19th February
 * sauna culture is feeling the heat'' - Conducting so much business in the buff was always a risky strategy - 12th February
 * and John Bercow: A panto couple who strayed into Parliament'' - Sally Bercow's strip-and-tell surely means curtains for a fairy-tale fiasco - 5th February
 * Open 2011: Whisper it not, but Andy Murray has a chance'' - A Grand Slam title for a British tennis player is within touching distance - 29th January
 * dinner party that went up in smoke'' - We didn't need the emergency services – but they arrived anyway - 22nd January
 * you are an MP now, so act like one'' - Miliband the elder should stop hawking himself about and clock in at work - 15th January
 * won the Ashes? What was I on?'' - There’s an air of dreamlike unreality to our stunning victory over Australia - 8th January



Articles: 2010

 * Assange is a glamorous hero – for now'' - The WikiLeaks founder's image depends on the credibility of his supporters - 18th December
 * feud has more fire than the Ashes'' - The Botham-Chappell animosity shows the true essence of sport - 11th December
 * curious case of what Katie didn’t do next'' - Radio 4 listeners will be denied a real festive treat, suggests Matthew Norman - 27th November
 * a major flaw in David Cameron’s plan for national happiness'' - Ken Dodd’s not a peer and this isn’t Knotty Ash - 20th November
 * country needs you – and your vases'' - The Chinese economy is set to subsume all in its path. Time to wise up - 13th November
 * sporting fix I've come to love and hate'' - Sport’s ability to inspire us is matched only by its ability to infuriate - 6th November
 * midterm elections 2010: The wingnuts may be the President's salvation'' - Surely Barack Obama could not lose in a showdown with Palin - 30th October
 * Factor: We are all Cowell's Children now'' - It's a fake festival of musical mediocrity, but not to watch X Factor is a form of self-ostracism - 26th October
 * you heard the one about Nick Clegg?'' - The Lib Dems aren't laughing at the PM's favourite joke any more - 23rd October
 * laughter is all we’ve got left'' - It isn’t the BBC’s business to stop comedians from causing offence - 16th October
 * Factor 2010: Why are we crying? Because Simon Cowell says'' - Whether from emotion or disgust, we all weep at 'The X Factor’ - 9th October
 * feet have got no rhythm, George Michael'' - Hopefully a jail term will restore George Michael's powers - 18th September
 * a farce whichever Miliband brother wins the Labour leadership'' - The Opposition's leadership contenders are such a talentless bunch - 14th August
 * am I bid for a bit of John Prescott?'' - The trade in celebrity body parts seems to know no bounds - 31st July
 * Blair is a saint for helping the needy rich'' - Mrs Blair was merely performing an unpaid kindness in Albania - 24th July



The Independent:
Column name: Monday diary: Norman on Monday

Remit/Info: Political affairs

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Role: Political commentator

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Email: [mailto:m.norman@independent.co.uk m.norman@independent.co.uk]

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Articles: 2016

 * Want to know what Donald Trump’s America will look like? Check out the crowds at the Ryder Cup - Nothing flushes the racist American out of his hidey hole like the sight of Obama in a golf buggy, when they believe he should be serving mint juleps in the clubhouse - 3rd October
 * Hillary Clinton made sure Donald Trump was slaughtered by his own buffoonery - While she grew in strength the longer it went on, it was Trump who visibly tired. She looked like she belonged on a banknote. He looked like he belonged in detention - 27th September
 * This TV debate between Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton will decide the future of the free world - For the first time in debate history, no one beyond the two camps – and in Trump’s case, quite possibly within it – has a clue what to expect - 26th September
 * Jeremy Corbyn is coming out in support of Theresa May more and more – and I for one find it very gallant - Gordon Brown could have warned him about ‘What is your favourite biscuit?’ Brown was slaughtered on Mumsnet for first refusing to answer, and then taking a day to dredge up a miserably vague ‘Anything with a bit of chocolate’ - 21st September
 * The Labour Party has subscribed to mob rule – and that’s exactly what it wants - Labour will effectively cease to be dedicated to winning power, and instead be recreated as a populist crusade in which MPs are subservient to the rank and file’s will - 19th September
 * David Cameron knows how awful his legacy is, and is getting exactly what he deserves: a whimper into obscurity - Nobody knew what this decomposing political corpse stood for until the end, but now we do: all he ever believed in was keeping his job - 14th September
 * Owen Smith is right about his 0.25% chance of becoming the next Labour leader - “I have never met a brighter man,” his wife Liz told The Mirror. The cynic might advise her to get out more - 12th September
 * Thank God David Davis has finally clarified what Brexit will mean for Britain – for a second there I was worried - If 'Brexit means Brexit' is genius – and it is – this has less than nothing to do with the factual accuracy which is such a wickedly devalued currency in the context. 'John is John,' Tony Blair said of Prescott after he biffed the eggman, and that also was true - 7th September
 * It's heroic of Keith Vaz to have done so much personal research into the prostitution laws he was helping to reform - How on earth is the Home Affairs committee chair to acquaint himself with the ins and outs of male prostitution, if not by having affairs at home with male prostitutes? How better to investigate the impact of cocaine than by offering it to guests, and observing its effects on mind and body close-up? - 5th September
 * Strictly Come Dancing will set Ed Balls on the winding road to national treasuredom - Here in Trumpworld the traditional boundaries between politics and entertainment no longer exist - 30th August
 * Hillary’s health is good, but who will say the same about the condition of US politics? - It spirals on, this massively entertaining, hugely terrifying collision between worlds – the real one and the parallel universe of Trump’s creation – masquerading as a presidential election - 29th August
 * In a post-Brexit market, it’s great to hear our ethically questionable arms deals with Saudi Arabia are booming - Coming second to the US in the medals table at one Olympics might be a flash in the pan. Finishing second behind America year after year in the global league of net arms exporters suggests a commitment to flogging the means of death to any regime, however disgusting, with the cash to buy them - 24th August
 * Rio 2016: Mo Farah and Andy Murray deserve knighthoods for restoring British patriotism - If Sebastian Coe was thought worthy of a life peerage for winning two Olympic golds and losing at judo to William Hague, Farah should certainly have a hereditary one - 22nd August
 * Theresa May’s popularity should come as no surprise – just look at her holiday photos - If the holidaying Family Blair was the perfect emblem for post-millennial, gold-taps-and-private-jets Eurotrash vulgarity, May’s Alpine retreat makes her the poster girl for a much earlier age - 14th August
 * Donald Trump is not a messiah, he’s a very naughty four-year-old boy – and that's how Hillary should treat him - The Donald knows he’s out of his depth and the unceasing spouting of embarrassing nonsense is a symptom of his distress - 7th August
 * Throw Philip Green into a reality show with the other Brexiteers – it would be Theresa May’s perfect punishment - Even if you disagree and hate the system, at least acknowledge this: the vision of Green making his Lords debut flanked by two Tory sponsors might illuminate the rancidness of British honours for anyone still in the dark about that - 26th July
 * Forget Sam Allardyce, the man for our times – you might as well appoint the Toilet Duck as England manager - The endless debate over England’s footballing failures is like an elongated version of the haiku. Cleaving to that poetic form’s 17 syllables, this is my take: England’s always been bloody useless at international football - 25th July
 * RNC 2016: Donald Trump could appear naked with a Trotsky tattoo on his chest and still become US president - Donald Jnr and daughter Ivanka could decide to show their love for Game of Thrones by starting a family together and the odds still wouldn’t shift in Hillary Clinton’s favour - 20th July
 * Labour now risks splitting off into two equally ridiculous parties, fighting over a name that’s already been tarnished forever - Which entity – the one recognised as legitimate by parliament or by the members – will be legally entitled to call itself ‘Labour’? Might ‘Labour’ feature in two or more competing forms – Labour vs Continuity Labour, for instance, or Labour vs Classic Labour vs Jerry C’s Labour Show? - 18th July
 * Theresa May’s treatment of Labour will tell us all we need to know about her leadership style - It is what she does – or does not do – to Labour that will offer the best early guide to her potential. Were Cameron in her kitten heels with George Osborne advising him, you know what he would do - 13th July
 * Andrea Leadsom would be the final piece of the crackpot puzzle that is Britain today - You need neither be a Tory nor a fan of the Home Secretary to find yourself waking at 3.30 am, in a muck sweat and screaming 'May Day, May Day …' - 11th July
 * No Iraq exit plan then, no EU Brexit plan now – 13 years later our politicians are still infantile and inadequate - If the British public’s reflexive distrust of establishment politicians came into riotous bloom in June, it was Tony Blair who sowed the seed in 2003. The similarities between these twin catastrophes are overwhelming - 8th July
 * We have slipped into a parallel universe – and we’re one step closer to the inauguration of President Trump - In the last 10 days, the credibility dam has burst. Wales are European semi-finalists, Novak Djokovic fell at Wimbledon and Hillary Clinton is being interviewed by the FBI - 3rd July
 * For desperate Remainers, there is a glimmer of hope: there is no British constitution - If the aftershocks of Brexit have unmistakably reversed the public mood, as narrowly expressed on Thursday, would a second membership referendum still be unthinkable? Without a written constitution, Parliament can do whatever the hell it pleases - 29th June
 * The Labour Party is over and Jeremy Corbyn's stupidity brought it down - Being a decent chap with values shared by young idealists and old lefties like me is not enough. It is not the beginning of enough - 27th June
 * Want your stomach turned? Watch Boris Johnson and Michael Gove pretending to be sorry about destroying Cameron's career - An ostentatiously heartbroken Gove’s quivery-voiced paean of love to the “great Prime Minister” he helped destroy is enough to cause genuine nausea - 25th June
 * David Cameron will go down in history as the Prime Minister who killed his country - Whether Cameron leaves office in October with just the one broken Union to his name, or whether his folly triggers the referendum domino effect that knocks down the entire EU itself, time will tell - 24th June
 * Why I'm In: No one will vote Remain out of love - but I want my country back - A Britain driven from the EU by phantom fears about an invasion force of millions of Turks, or seduced by a sad, atavistic Dad’s Army echo of standing defiantly alone with forces of darkness menacingly poised on the other side of the Channel? No thanks - 22nd June
 * As our alternative monarch, David Beckham backing Remain could spark a constitutional crisis - For undecided voters, a choice between the gorgeous mestrosexual demigod and that guy in the purple shell suit who thinks giant lizards run the planet might prove persuasive - 22nd June
 * Jo Cox's death is not a threat to democracy – it is a threat to our right to regard ourselves as civilised - More than 30 years after the Thatcher government launched the cost-slashing exercise euphemised as Care in the Community, care for the mentally ill has, as is acknowledged across the political divide, degenerated into a mark of national shame - 19th June
 * The US gun lobby will tolerate infinite slaughter for the right to bear arms. This is democracy in the raw - Obama’s weary defeatism speaks in painful experience of the domestic limits on presidential power - 15th June
 * Corbyn is the de facto leader of the EU referendum’s Meh faction - The Labour leader appears to be addicted to his irrelevance in the Brexit debate - 13th June
 * This is what Britain will look like in 2025 if we leave the EU - Eight years after replacing David Cameron, Boris Johnson acknowledges that no victory in democratic history has been more pyrrhic - 8th June
 * Charging Paul Gascoigne with racial abuse for a joke is a wilful act of cruelty toward a struggling alcoholic - In what surreal madhouse is an offensive joke automatically conflated with a criminal offence? - 5th June
 * The final chapter of Muhammad Ali's life was the most poignant – he became a martyr - Muhammad Ali became something else in the final act of his life. He became an uncomplaining martyr; an increasingly statuesque testament to the capacity of the human spirit to endure - 4th June
 * In cosying up to Cameron so soon after an odious anti-Muslim Tory campaign, Sadiq Khan disappointed us all - What Khan was really doing by so overtly relishing this ego-massaging love-in was tacitly suggesting that race-baiting is nothing to fret about so long as it’s spouted during a campaign. He owed it to young Muslims everywhere not to forget so quickly - 1st June
 * After 25 years, Americans are bored with Hillary Clinton – and it could stop her becoming the first female president - With the Middle East in relentless turmoil this is no time for a novelty act novice like Donald Trump. But while we fear change, in that adolescent country across the Atlantic they crave it - 31st May
 * Jose Mourinho, the most hated man in football, is back at the top. Here's what to expect - Every drama, sporting and otherwise, needs its anti-hero and there is little doubt that he is the bête-noire of the beautiful game - 25th May
 * The Chilcot report won’t tell us anything new, but there is one lesson we can take from it - Egomaniacs like Blair are an inevitable democratic menace. The question is how to create a system that restricts their scope to do monstrous harm - 23rd May
 * Who trusted David Cameron to tell the truth about Brexit? He's a politician, after all - Both sides in the EU referendum campaign have spouted so much screeching gibberish that no one yet to make up their mind can still be listening - 18th May
 * Boris Johnson has reduced the EU referendum to a question of 'what would Hitler do?' - He may be proving Godwin’s Law yet again, but Boris knows Winston Churchill was once dismissed as a plummy-voiced opportunist – and when the hour of truth came, he proved his nation’s saviour - 16th May
 * Which terrifying nation do you suppose David Cameron thinks will go to war with us after Brexit? I have some ideas - Petrifying potential foes include Cyprus, Slovenia and the regional superpower of Malta - 11th May
 * I like Corbyn but he's a gentleman amateur in a vicious pro sport - it's time for him to honourably step aside - The right-wing media have made a caricature of the Labour leader, and now he has little hope of winning the rest of the country over. A pulverising defeat for a Corbyn manifesto, however much you and I may agree with it, will not help the disabled - 8th May
 * Talk to a hypochondriac like me before advising patients to treat themselves to save the NHS - The mid-afternoon fatigue might well be a natural part of middle age. Then again, it could be an underactive thyroid, sleep apnea, leukaemia – or any of 61,000 other disorders - 25th April
 * Michael Gove and Boris Johnson know that if we leave the EU, Scotland leaves us - so what's going on? - “I am praying that we will wake from this sleepwalk to tragedy; and that the Scots vote no to divorce, and yes to Britain, the greatest political union ever," Boris Johnson wrote only two years ago - 20th April
 * The John Whittingdale revelations make David Cameron look a lame duck - After his mishandling of the EU referendum and the Panama Papers, this latest scandal does nothing to assuage concerns about our Prime Minister's judgement - 17th April
 * David Miliband says Brexit means Britain will lose its relevance. Doesn’t he realise he’s already lost his own? - Miliband the Elder must be pinning his future hopes on flirting his way into the White House with Hillary Clinton, in a modern version of The Graduate - 13th April
 * David Cameron was born with so many privileges. The only thing he lacks is an understanding of other people - Had our Prime Minister a decent imagination, he'd have told his mother to keep her £200,000 - 11th April
 * The Panama papers scandal is like a bad John Grisham novel, but the elite are always getting away with it - While Knightsbrige pied-a-terres hide their wealth, those who hold the keys to the Treasury dream of retreiving money from the disabled - 5th April
 * This could be the end for Donald Trump - The tangerine huckster has finally said something that even the Republican base - mad as it is - considers distasteful - 4th April
 * The EU choice is clear: let in murderers and rapists or ruin your children's lives. Thank God we've resisted hyperbole - On and on and on it goes, this wretched, witless race to the paranoid bottom - 30th March
 * Bernie Sanders makes me wish I was 20, just to experience the sweetness of first political disappointment - What the middle aged smugly know as naive idealism is the recognition of simple truth - 28th March
 * The buck should stop with the Prime Minister for his immoral disability cuts - Cameron’s political hero is Mr Tony Blair (“the master”) who was so adroit at using lightning rods to spare himself the heat - 21st March
 * Corbyn’s post-Budget response is doomed before he starts to speak - Throughout a six-month period of barely broken turmoil, Corybn’s calm has been supernatural - 16th March
 * Gove is a clever man. It’s a shame about the lack of common sense - This scrape may be Michael Gove’s last as a Cabinet minister for a while - 14th March
 * The moment has come when laughing at Donald Trump stops and horror rises - Trump isn’t Adolf Hitler… Hitler was not a two-bit charlatan with an arrestable-offence spray tan. He had unshakable beliefs - 9th March
 * The real intrigue lies with the no-shows at Murdoch’s wedding - The absence of Tony Blair was unsurprising, but what about David Cameron and Boris Johnson? - 7th March
 * Though it pains me to say it, I admire Boris’s steel-clad balls - It is as a problem gambler, rather than a political observer, that I salute him for making this punt - 24th February
 * You don't have to like Hillary Clinton - but you do have to realise we need her - She is in many ways a weak candidate, which is why the even older demi-socialist Sanders runs her close. But does any of that matter when weighed against the potential for the Middle East, that tinderbox of a region, to spark a forest fire far beyond its land mass? - 22nd February
 * Mourn the passing of Antonin Scalia, Genghis Khan of the US Supreme Court - To the “hang ’em, flog ’em, eletrocute ’em, and just for luck lynch ’em” persuasion, Scalia was an archangel - 15th February
 * David Cameron, like the rest of us, is not immune to criticism from his mother - So far as I’m aware, a maternal assault on a serving PM is unprecedented - 12th February
 * Trident’s a billion-pound codpiece to hide our total emasculation - To new voters, spending tens of billions on a uranium-enriched merkin must seem deranged - 10th February
 * The humbling of Marco Rubio puts Trump back on top - The sporting shocks come not only thick and fast, but in fat - 8th February
 * The Tories are creating a one-party state – and nobody gives a damn - They are squeezing every source of party political funding except, wouldn’t you know it, rich donors - 3rd February
 * It’s not Andy Murray’s fault that he’s playing in the same era as Novak Djokovic - Whatever the explanation, the Murray of yesterday morning was palpably beaten from the start - 1st February
 * We thought Trump was the comic relief. Who’s laughing now? -He legitimises their Jim Crow racism by affecting to share it and offers hope that he can take America back to 1956 - 27th January
 * Bowie and Murdoch – both powerful shapers of our modern culture - Both were compellingly other-worldly, as if they had arrived from a galaxy far, far away - 13th January



Articles: 2015

 * Need some predictions for 2016? Here's a breakdown, from Trump and Corbyn to Sebastian Coe and the Queen - In April, the Daily Mail demands that Corbyn be charged with high treason for failing to volunteer to have both his kidneys removed and kept on ice on the off chance that the Queen might one day suffer renal failure - 30th December
 * Arise Dame Babs, the last authentic voice of a working class London - Windsor has battled and endured, and in the process probably given more pleasure to the public than any other actress alive - 28th December
 * So long, BBC sport – you’re dying a suicide by smugness - Blinding itself to the mounting evidence of its decline, the BBC never questioned its divine right to rule - 23rd December
 * Was the phone-hacking scandal all just a dream? - How could we have forgotten the first rule of our national life: nothing every really changes? - 13th December
 * The rise of Donald Trump and Marine Le Pen shows Ukip has failed in Britain - There are no second acts (and very few first acts) for vulgar racists in British politics - 9th December
 * I asked Tony Benn what he thought of his son's vote on Iraq – and learned never to go there again - Like almost all fathers, there was nothing but pride there - 5th December
 * My OCD is like a religion - and this pencil is my God - Most people have a superstition. There’s even a name for my dread of the number 8 - 28th November
 * It’s time to open a book on the next Labour leader - The knives may be out once and for all for Jeremy Corbyn - 23rd November
 * I say this with regret, but Corbyn looks detached over terrorism - A politician devoid of visceral revulsion represents himself as something other than rest of us - 18th November
 * Like the crooks he’ll leave behind, Lord Coe should run for his life - Coe will need years to have even the slightest chance of steering the IAAF through the nightmare - 12th November
 * Let’s have more of this ‘anti-democracy’ from the House of Lords - One could point out that to attack a constitution, there needs to be a constitution to attack; something written down - 28th October
 * Sucking up to China won’t be an issue – we have plenty of practice - Britain is essentially Basil Fawlty, bullying the weak and prostrating herself before the powerful - 21st October
 * Is this the most cretinous of all Tory backbenchers? - As the son and one-time employee of a high-street bookmaker, Philip Davies will know whether it represents value when I install him as 13-8 favourite for Hyper-Cerebral Backbencher of the Year - 19th October
 * Corbyn can no longer ignore the spectre of his imminent demise - Labour's civil war is bound to have a bloody end - 14th October
 * David Cameron is half way to being our most progressive Prime Minister - For the first time, he now has a clear, credible and explicable agenda that can change Britain’s destiny - 10th October
 * Jeremy Hunt's leadership claim shows a man grotesquely out of his depth - Politically, he is a cosmetic surgeon who sees his calling as putting the best possible face on the ugly - 7th October
 * My prison fantasies have all gone up in smoke - No more deadlines, no more neurosing over bills - it all sounded like a release, until they banned cigarettes... - 3rd October
 * The Labour conference speech I would give if I were in Jeremy Corbyn’s shoes... - 30th September
 * Ashcroft’s farmyard fun diverts us from Cameron’s serious incompetence - According to another claim in Ashcroft's new book, Cameron never learnt to be a sensible, responsible commander - 23rd September
 * Diane Abbott's alleged affair with Corbyn only makes me more sure she can handle her new political role - 20th September
 * If Jeremy Corbyn ignores the right-wing press, he will be exterminated - Corbyn has a month at most to avoid being indelibly branded as a shambolic buffoon - 15th September
 * Don’t take my word for it, but Stella’s destined to be Labour leader - Creasy shows all the hallmarks of leadership material - 24th August
 * Corbyn’s success is down to one man. Now what was his name? - Moments before the nomination deadline Andew Smith became the 35th and clinching MP to support Corbyn - 12th August
 * Is this a Trotskyite revolution or more scaremongering by Labour’s far right? - It is, of course, nostalgic fun to hear 'Militant' trotted out as a lethal menace again - 28th July
 * Behold the rise of the joke candidate, from Andy Burnham to Donald Trump - We have drifted into a strange nexus where the riotously humorous and the profoundly grave meet - 22nd July
 * Doughty Hunt scrubs up to lead from front on weekend working - Or was the health secretary out shopping? - 20th July
 * Labour’s tragedy is that Jeremy Corbyn is much the best leadership candidate - This black-hole contest distorts time; it feels like years since the shortlist was unveiled - 16th July
 * Lib Dems shouldn’t put their faith in divine intervention - Farron’s latest claim that he lacks ambition hints at a sinfully laissez faire relationship with the Commandment - 28th June
 * Untold lives wouldn’t need saving if we followed the Cuban model of focusing on preventative healthcare - If you want to improve cancer survival rates, the answer isn’t bypassing specialists - 24th June
 * For just £3, you could help make the Corbyn fantasy come true - A victory for Jeremy would be the most dramatic upset in political history - 22nd June
 * Uber is overwhelming – London black cabs’ only future is tourism and tetchy Tories - The black cabs may never surrender, but they will be defeated by the internet - 20th June
 * If you’re worried about Bilderberg, just take a look at the guest list... - Even the most fanciful alarmist will accept that Michael O’Leary could play no part in global domination - 10th June
 * Great Auntie Liz takes Yvette on a merry tap dance to Westminster - If Yvette’s Hampshire childhood wasn’t quite as Dickensian as her story hints, the last thing she’d do is ramp up the poverty cred to appeal to her electorate - 8th June
 * The strangely parallel lives of Oliver Letwin and Ed Miliband - The similarities between the pair are uncanny enough to warrant the ‘Twilight Zone’ theme - 3rd June
 * Will James May and Richard Hammond keep Top Gear's flame of inspired puerility alive? - Jeremy Clarkson's sidekicks may yet appear in a revamped version of the show - 1st June
 * It may be early-onset senility to blame, but I’m sure the FA Cup Final used to be far more memorable - The FA’s complacent idiocy turned a globally revered tournament into the festival of meh it is today - 30th May
 * How can anyone say Test match cricket is dying after this glorious, complex battle? - The crowd was sated in a way no one can be by the cheap McCricket thrills of Twenty20 - 27th May
 * Labour and the unions are destined to remain in their tense but loveless marriage - The McCluskey volcano will probably remain dormant if Burnham wins - 20th May
 * A politician shouldn’t care more about himself than his party - Chuka said he didn’t feel “ready”, but even that is barely an explanation for why, after overtly manoeuvring for the leadership for years, the short-priced favourite pulled out - 18th May
 * Has new Culture Secretary John Whittingdale any idea of the damage betting machines do? - I invite him to spend a day walking through a few of London’s centres of urban deprivation, where streets are festooned with more bookmakers than charity shops - 16th May
 * Labour leadership: A scan of runners and riders reveals poor form - or no form at all - This general election was more catastrophic for Labour than that of 1992 - this one is so much worse that it’s hard to know where to begin - 11th May
 * David Cameron may have won the election, but it’s for wrecking the Union that he’ll be remembered - He roused such resentment across the border that Scotland has made itself a virtual one-party state - to the crippling cost of Labour - 8th May
 * Election 2015: Me, my 18-year-old son, and why I’m voting Labour - Regardless of who forms whatever kind of government, Miliband will come out of this election cycle as the clear winner - 6th May
 * Election 2015: The SNP and an SMC (Salmond-Murdoch Conspiracy) - Plus Cameron’s dose of (Red) Bull and Balls’ bouncing cheques - 4th May
 * If Lynton Crosby were a football manager, he'd be Jose Mourinho - It isn’t just the steamroller negativity, but the reliance on confected paranoia - 30th April
 * Remember when David Cameron almost cried over Scotland because he loved it so much? - It turns out he was being as sincere as Tony Soprano sympathising with the widow of someone he had killed - 27th April
 * What Cameron really needs is to turn this into a khaki election - The PM is a more retrograde strategist than Blackadder's General Melchett - 20th April
 * Saving the NHS is easy if you don’t need to say where the money’s from - Do polls show that voters have the minds of Dr Pavlov’s dogs, drooling the moment they hear 'extra £8bn for health'? - 13th April
 * David Cameron and Dick Dastardly – two tricksters impossible to tell apart - 'The Wacky Races' has, in a case of Jungian synchronicity, pulled in to electoral relevance - 8th April
 * So where will Duncan Smith find those £12bn of welfare savings? - Iain lives in a fantasy land of beanstalks leading to gold-filled chests and unicorns dancing the tango with centaurs - 30th March
 * In one interview, Cameron lost the only thing he had going for him - Gordon Brown at his lunatic worst would not have done this - 25th March
 * It’s a sorry day for The Sun with Kelvin MacKenzie back in its pages - When he was editor he accused Liverpool supporters of attacking rescue workers, abusing a dead girl, and urinating on corpses - 23rd March
 * Forget right and left, where do you stand on Jeremy Clarkson? - His latest spat sounds like it was modelled on the ‘Waldorf Salad’ episode of ‘Fawlty Towers’ - 16th March
 * With a past like hers, Margaret Hodge might show a bit more humility - In the Eighties Hodge was aware of previous child sex abuse in the care homes for which she was responsible, and did nothing about it - 11th March
 * £3bn to repair Parliament? Knock it into flats and send MPs up North - In contrast to the Bercow masterplan, my idea would cost taxpayers nothing - 4th March
 * What was Ed Balls thinking? Was he thinking at all? - Between Chancellor and Shadow Chancellor, we have two men who have made a complete mess of handling the tax-avoidance issue - 18th February
 * For Iain Duncan Smith’s next trick, he should tax the rich like he punishes the poor - No one empathises with the needy more than IDS... - 16th February
 * If Clegg loses his seat this man may hold the balance of power - Does anyone in the Lib Dems have a clue? - 9th February
 * Ed Miliband needs to find his inner Rocky - Pinned to the ropes, the only option is to come out throwing haymakers - 4th February
 * What's that? A Monaco-based billionaire has attacked Ed Miliband, who wants to clamp down on tax avoidance? Hold the press! - The owner of Boots is a real master of surprise - 3rd February
 * Benedict Cumberbatch race row: What's the actual difference between 'coloured' and 'person of colour'? - I haven’t had time to check my privilege on this one yet, but I can't see why his comments are so controversial - 28th January
 * Could Ukip turncoat Amjad Bashir be the Churchill of his day? - Anyone who has stated that what most attracted him to Ukip was its discipline deserves a legislative voice - 26th January
 * There will always be anti-semitism, but let’s also remember how protected and valued we Jews in the UK are - Where is the evidence that I should be succumbing to fear and abandoning these shores? - 21st January
 * Why has a former cheerleader hauled Ed Miliband over the carpet? - According to the Mail on Sunday, Miliband should have caused panic by heralding the financial meltdown well in advance - 19th January
 * After Charlie Hebdo, journalists have to be honest about how far they are prepared to go - Anyone can state pieties about defending the right to free speech - 14th January
 * Emptychairing Cameron? Ed Miliband missed a trick - If Cameron’s best notion of proving himself true blue is to mix his yellow streak with those sincere concerns for the excluded Greens, that is his right - 12th January
 * The dangers of foresight and hindsight meet in election predictions - Is it really a good idea to claim there's no way we'll have another coalition come May? - 5th January



Articles: 2014

 * If the UK does end up breaking apart at some point in the future, we can blame Oliver Letwin - It turns out that he effectively rescued the poll tax for Margaret Thatcher - 31st December
 * Bring on the 2015 general election! And another one straight after! - It’s only natural to love a bit of chaos - 24th December
 * Labour's Simon Danczuk is flirting with Nigel Farage, but will he answer his prayers and defect? - Even if he doesn't, the MP could be trying to send a signal to the Rochdale electorate about his true stance on immigration - 23rd December
 * First Sports Personality of the Year and then X Factor: The people have spoken... and they haven’t got a clue - While we may safely be permitted the trivial political choices, it's obvious that we cannot be trusted with the serious stuff - 17th December
 * Jim Murphy can start his long jog into the wilderness now - One need not understand the Murphy mind to salute the self-sacrificial little lamb - 15th December
 * Penny Mordaunt's 'fowl' language might not fly with the British press, but does anyone else actually care? - The MP has been caught inserting the word "cock" into one of her speeches for a bet - 1st December
 * David Mellor is a bully and a braggart of the first order — where is his class now? - The Tory grandee's awful verbal attack on a cab driver doesn't teach us anything that we don't already know - 26th November
 * Did Cameron develop his fatal flaw from the late Uncle Bill? - Cameron can never quite shake off the taint of being an Edwardian gent trapped out of time - 18th November
 * Why Labour is going to pay the “British Nate Silver” almost as handsomely as Ukip did - General elections are now won far less by ideas than by algorithms - 11th November
 * Mike Read’s Ukip calypso is mesmerisingly atrocious — but it's not racist - If it seems a peculiar musical form for a pre-2014 election campaign anthem, well, isn’t that the central point about Ukip? - 22nd October
 * Sorry Dave — TV debates might be scary but so is being Prime Minister, so just get on with it - However wounding the encounters might be, Cameron will only make things worse if he tries to avoid them - 15th October
 * Alan Johnson’s lack of leadership ambition is inexcusable - There is nothing charming about a gifted, hugely popular politican preferring the sidelines - 14th October
 * Keane and Pietersen reveal the ego-fuelled fight for truth in sport - Neither are able to understand a simple lesson — a genius will get away with being a seething cauldron of egomania only for as long as the genius endures - 8th October
 * A flu pandemic could decide next year’s election - If anything is to break the four-party politics deadlock, it could well be the NHS - 1st October
 * Could Brooks Newmark and Mark Reckless have timed things any better? - Ed Miliband can breathe easier than he deserves to this week - 29th September
 * One second Cameron cries for the Union, the next he’s joined the Poor Little Englanders - We now know that when the Cameron lachrymals are activated… reverse the meaning of his next sentence - 24th September
 * In what universe is Hilary Mantel's imaginary assassination of Margret Thatcher worthy of police investigation? - Only among Mrs T’s cronies - 22nd September
 * Scottish independence: Cameron faces a choice between destroying his country or his party - A No vote will be nothing more than a temporary stay of the death sentence - 17th September
 * Salmond couldn’t have picked a better shower of 11th-hour opponents - The First Minister has been blessed. Just watch them go - 15th September
 * For Gordon Brown, redemption is at hand - The former Prime Minister is reborn as a superhero today. He may have found his moment in history - 10th September
 * Rupert Murdoch likes to back a winner. So what’s he doing cosying up to Nigel Farage? - This is tactical posturing designed to petrify the Tories - 8th September
 * When the course of history is on the line, democracy is a raw, vicious and filthy business - A little light intimidation has always been part and parcel of the game - 3rd September
 * As one of Ukip's biggest donors, Stuart Wheeler is helping fund a revolution - But what do we actually know about the exceedingly right-wing septuagenarian? - 1st September
 * Boris Johnson's suggestion that we should do away with the presumption of innocence is comedy gold - Always the joker, Bojo's plan for British Isis fighters is grandstanding at its best - 27th August
 * From 007 to Donald Sinden in five easy steps: making yourself irrelevant, the Julian Assange way - We were once mesmerised by him, but now he's just a half-forgotten curio - 20th August
 * Poor old Cliff Richard is the latest to fall victim to the curse of being Tony Blair’s pal - Who would want to join a club that has Gaddafi and Berlusconi as its members? - 18th August
 * It looks like Osborne has placed a Trojan Horse in the camp of his rival for party leadership. Or would you call it an alpine yak? - He's Boris Johnson's main rival for the succession - 11th August
 * Doctor, doctor – I think we’re on the verge of a major global catastrophe - It would seem like the shortage of GPs and hospital beds has put GPs under pressure to hand out antibiotics like sweets - 6th August
 * Does David Cameron actually believe in his tough new immigration stance? - Part Lynton Crosby, part Liam Neeson, our PM has swapped compassionate Conservatism for the political sledgehammer - 30th July
 * It would be wrong to compare brave Tulisa’s ordeal with phone hacking. It’s much worse than that - The way Mazher Mahmood treated Tulisa makes her more of a victim than any celebrity who had their phone hacked - 23rd July
 * The whips can no longer maintain Westminster's shroud of secrecy - They've long been the secret-keepers of politics, but privilege can't protect them now - 9th July
 * Blunkett bravely equates the ‘terrible trauma’ inflicted by Harris and Coulson on their victims – such as himself - It's insensitive at best, and cloyingly narcissistic at worst - 7th July
 * Cameron’s ‘Cool Brittania II’ was more like the night Britain lost all its cultural relevance - You know your celebrity bash is in trouble when Vernon Kaye is too cool to attend - 2nd July
 * Let’s not forget that Rebekah Brooks was a victim too. Goodness me, yes… - How could we dispute the Murdoch press’s reporting of the outcome of the hacking trial? - 30th June
 * Jenny Jones an extremist? Nice work, Met Police - Of course the 64-year-old Green peeresses with the potential to wield bicycle clips is a lethal enemy of the state - 17th June
 * Theresa May should tell Boris that the advent of Philip Neville as an effective anaesthetic means water cannons are no longer needed - Neville revealed himself to be a viciously soporific dullard - 15th June
 * What precisely are 'British values'? - If they are the same as the Coalition’s, does that mean CCTV cameras in class and lessons in bashing the poor? - 10th June
 * Despite all evidence to the contrary, Iain Duncan Smith still insists everything is tickety-boo with his big project - His bold attempt to restrict welfare is an even bigger calamity than previously thought - 26th May
 * Does Miliband really want to win the election? - You have to wonder anew whether the politician’s ungodly resilience is a sign of strength, paralysis or delusion - 21st May
 * Women just aren’t emotionally stunted enough to be snooker players – but they’re not bad at getting worked up over nothing - A friend and I spent six hours struggling to remember who Ray Reardon beat in the 1978 world snooker final - 7th May
 * Max Clifford played a crucial role in the conviction of Jonathan King. Now the roles have been reversed - 5th May
 * The tragedy of David Moyes is one Nick Clegg will understand only too well: you can’t say no to the job, but can’t do it either - Unlike Ferguson’s vintage wines, Moyes neither travelled well nor matured - 23rd April
 * Luckily for Barbara Roche, formerly of the Home Office, Easter reminds us that heaven loves the repenting sinner best - 21st April
 * A new contender for the title of Most Overwhelmingly Persuasive Excuse Offered for Failure emerges - Tory backbencher Charlotte Leslie is in the running - 14th April
 * The PM should put Maria Miller out of her misery – but not at the behest of lazy keyboard-warriors - Online petitions, where it takes five seconds to tick a box between updating your Facebook page, seem dangerously glib - 9th April
 * Can any of us even imagine a Sunday morning which doesn’t include Iain Duncan Smith talking nonsense? - IDS’s latest tour de force concerned the rule change whereby the disabled now qualify for the full Employment and Support Allowance if they cannot walk 20 yards - 7th April
 * Politicians’ fortunes are now like football managers’ – at the mercy of phone-in culture - The electorate is ill-served when Cameron or Miliband is up one minute and down the next - 26th March
 * If IDS has got something against Canadians taking our plum banking jobs, he should come out and say it - If that ancient injunction “Beware the IDS of March when he’s talking self-aggrandising gibberish - 24th March
 * It's not just a row, it's a war. And I'd join Martin Amis for the march on Eton - His comments are a handy poke in the ribs for a country given to self-congratulation - 19th March
 * Gove going rogue and a new slimline Osborne can only mean one thing: the War of the Tory Succession is hotting up - We’re all in this together, as George Osborne’s belt-tightening shows - 17th March
 * A month ago, Bob Crow was reviled as a pina-colada-sipping hypocrite. But even Boris will miss him now he’s gone - Living under the dominion of beige technocrats, we crave colour in public figures - 12th March
 * I tried transcendental meditation to calm my boundless inner rage. But that just gave me paranoid delusions - Latterly, my quest for cardiac health has taken in yoga - also to no avail - 5th March
 * You’ve got to love a bit of Tory infighting. But who’s going to land the decisive punch? George Osborne or Boris Johnson? - A Tory defeat would fatally damage the London mayor’s golden image and clear Osborne’s path to the leadership - 3rd March
 * By George, Dr Carey’s right! All those poor people need food banks because their feckless parents never taught them to cook - This bishop holds quite different views to his clerical brethren - 26th February
 * Philip Hammond’s not sexist, he’s serially confused. Which bodes ill for British foreign policy - To be the victim of one fiasco may be a misfortune. Twice looks like a pattern - 24th February
 * Winter Olympics 2014: How can one possibly get excited about Curling? Very easily, it seems - British victories – like this one at Sochi – are irresistible, no matter how ridiculous the sport - 19th February
 * Classless society? Don’t make me laugh. It’s only when the floods hit the Home Counties that the PM puts his wellies on - As waters reached the Eton weights room, Cameron sprang into action - 12th February
 * ‘Pierce Blue Eyes’ is, no doubt, the working title for the film that Wendy Deng plans to make about her friendship with Tony Blair - No one could argue about the peachy skin, let alone the manly beauty of his legs - 10th February
 * There’s nothing the Right enjoys more than demonising Bob Crow. But why shouldn’t the Tube union’s boss take a holiday? - In this battle, it is Mr Crow who has shown the class and Boris who has played the thug - 5th February
 * Weakness? What weakness? Jack Straw will be the first to tell you that he's not really bad at anything - Perhaps the Right Honourable MP's memory needs a little jogging - 3rd February
 * Ed Balls can save all his Labour pals through self-sacrifice - Balls appears to be an unsackable shadow Chancellor - 29th January
 * With insights like these, Gerald Howarth must be a shoo-in for the Most Cerebral Backbencher award - This veteran intellectual giant of the frothing right has been a delight since first being elected in 1983 - 27th January
 * A Wetherspoon’s pub on the M40? Sounds like a Bernard Manning joke… - Road safety charities say the Hope and Champion offers ‘deadly temptation’ - 22nd January
 * Is David Cameron's sermon on the importance of loving thy neighbour to be taken in good faith? - In practice his Government stigmatises immigrants and the poor - 20th January
 * MP portraits: It’s either a hideous waste of public money – or a fitting way to immortalise our lawmakers... - In future, these works of art should be done by primary school surrealists - 15th January



Articles: 2013

 * Graeme Swann has stunned his sport by quitting mid cricket series. Will he give politicians ideas? - Fingers crosses this is the birth of a thrilling new trend - 23rd December
 * ‘Mission accomplished’ in Afghanistan? No, just a diversion from Catherine the Great - Cameron could not say the Afghan war has been a brutal exercise in nihilistic futility - 18th December
 * Is it time to start feeling sorry for Rupert Murdoch? - After an uncomfortable month, the mogul was barred from his son-in-law's birthday - 16th December
 * Benjamin Netanyahu’s refusal to attend Nelson Mandela’s memorial service speaks of Israel’s growing isolationism - Some will dispute the Israeli prime minister’s excuse of 'cost' issues - 11th December
 * Labour gathers the wild geese for one more tilt at the throne, but can Alastair and Wee Dougie really liberate the keys to No 10? - In the circumstances, it is impossible to keep the mind from straying to southern Africa - 9th December
 * For Indecisive Dave, this constant reversal of core beliefs must be terribly exhausting - Perhaps one day, the PM will decide who he is and what he believes - 4th December
 * Where are Alastair Campbell and John Scarlett when you need them to rebut this awful tittle-tattle about Tony and Wendi? - Details of the friendship continue to trickle into the public domain - 2nd December
 * Michael Clarke and the Ashes: The shocking thing about sledging is not the damage it causes but how witless it is - The prospect of violence has injected the Ashes with a powerful shot of adrenaline - 27th November
 * End of the affair: Has Rupert Murdoch has been struck by the curse of a close friendship with Mr Tony Blair? - A Murdoch spokesman tells the MoS that “Rupert Murdoch will have nothing more to do with Tony Blair. Not ever” - 25th November
 * Ed Miliband on ‘Desert Island Discs’: Surely ‘Great Balls of Fire’ is a cert for the Labour leader... - 18th November
 * Like father, like son – is that the moral of Nicky Blair’s career as a football agent? - Let's just hope any Middle East invasions turn out better than the old man's - 13th November
 * David Beckham's knighthood...You heard it first from the Spice Girls - If you remember the lyrics to 'Wannabe', you'll know why... - 11th November
 * From Russell Brand to Jeremy Paxman: We the Disillusioned hold a majority in modern politics - At the ballot, many millions deserve the chance to say “I loathe you all” - 6th November
 * The passions of Sven: could this finally explain 2006? - Nancy Dell'Olio may lie at the heart of England's World Cup exit - 5th November
 * Roll up for the ritual pantomine of politicians bashing the BBC - Worry not, the beeb is too battle-hardened to this thuggery to take much notice - 29th October
 * Burnley’s sad loss is the world’s gain, Alastair - The lobbying firm Campbell works for as an adviser has a new, very rich client - 28th October
 * Wheelchair beggars, there are jobs for you! Just ask Daniel Kawczynski - Couldn't Mr McGuigan and the Conservative MP swap roles? - 23rd October
 * The plebgate saga has left Jon Gaunt looking rather pale - We have heard much from Andrew Mitchell - but how about Jon Gaunt - 21st October
 * Top marks, Kenneth Baker. These technical schools are precisely what the nation needs - His system mixes maths, English and science with vocational training that leads to work - 16th October
 * Manuscript features memories of a youthful George Osborne - A book about to be published will allegedly be embarrassing for the Chancellor - 14th October
 * Want to know how Norman Baker got this job? I’ve got the answers - Mr Clegg could no longer resist the pressure to unveil himself as  a satirist - 9th October
 * Let’s celebrate the Mail’s rampant multiculturalism - We are all welcome to the paper's lighting of the Chanukah freedom lights - 7th October
 * The US shutdown isn’t serious, but the reasons behind it are - The GOP’s intrasigence under Obama has scaled maniacal heights - 2nd October
 * What's Iain Duncan Smith doing running welfare? - 30th September
 * Great speech Ed, but completely unnecessary - Miliband illustrated yet again that addressing the party conference is a perennial triumph of hope over experience - 25th September
 * Balls protests ignorance over McBride, but surely he is too saintly for politics? - Ed Balls has said he had no idea of Damien McBride’s machinations, revealed last week - 23rd September
 * Oh you nearly men - how different history could have been for Vince Cable and his like - Vince Cable seems destined to join the great lost leaders in the ghostly halls where political dreams go to die. There he will flit alongside Rab Butler and David Miliband - 18th September
 * Who’s the Labour insider about to spill the beans? - Surely the Daily Mail wouldn't stoop to employ the 'scurrilous' Damian McBride - 16th September
 * Ed Balls is still shouting. But who’s still listening? - You can’t win an election with a disregarded Cassandra for shadow Chancellor -11th September
 * Mr Tony Blair is having another fabulous Gap year - Presumably the former PM is content with Vietnam's human rights record - 9th September
 * Can't get your policy through Parliament? Try effing and blinding instead - If a man as generally thoughtful and mannerly as Mr Gove now feels emboldened to act like a partisan football fan something at Westminster must have changed - 4th September
 * An end to the emotional nonsense from Malcolm Rifkind - 2nd September
 * We’ve come a long way. Last time, the harassed Brazilian was shot dead - It’s a disgrace that police detained foreign national David Miranda, who they had no cause to suspect - 21st August
 * Alan Johnson’s conditional love of Labour - However charming the candour, what is he playing at with such obvious subliminal messaging? - 19th August
 * Prince Charles’s cosy chats with ministers? Just a bit of therapy - He is less petulant now – almost endearing, even, as he approaches his dotage - 14th August
 * If there are any heroes, Andy Burnham's not one of them - 12th August
 * If anyone can find a viable plan for newspapers, Jeff Bezos can - Anyone who loves and values newspapers should rejoice at this turn of events - 7th August
 * Of course Gareth Bale should go to Real Madrid. We may mourn his departure, but how can you expect loyalty in modern football? - I've exchanged words with Daniel Levy in the past. This time, it all feels futile - 31st July
 * Theresa May’s insulin chic could be next dieting fad - John Prescott claims, most inappropriately, that he got there first - 29th July
 * The Royal baby might have to wait 50 years. But the UK will still be the same - The plus-ça-change nature of an unbroken royal line  is a reassuring force - 24th July
 * ‘British Obama’ Chuka carries Blairite torch - 22nd July
 * IDS politically motivated? God forbid! - What with him being a politician, it's possible that his motivation in claiming that the housing benefit cap is propelling hordes of the unemployed back to work is political - 17th July
 * Farewell, Milibandroid the Elder, and come again soon - It will take more than International Rescue to steal the thunder of David Miliband - 15th July
 * Knighted or not, Andy Murray can still teach Ed Miliband a thing or two - Only a few months ago, Labour’s leader was the equivalent of a set and a break up - 10th July
 * Surely the best is yet to come from John Inverdale - 8th July
 * For Michael Gove, the Pol Pot of education, every year is Year Zero - In isolation, the Meisterplan of for-profit schools looks fraught with problems. As part of the wider picture in which the public service ethos is dying, it is deeply depressing - 3rd July
 * Who’s the biggest liar: Churchill or Blair? Ali knows - Plus, the greatness of Mandela has touched even Lewis Hamilton - 30th June
 * It's time to commemorate the First World War, but don't let's be beastly to the Germans says Ms Miller - Culture secretary Maria Miller's had an interesting insight into the First World War, the commemoration of which she'll oversee if she somehow survives the next reshuffle - 12th June
 * The Special One says that he’s a changed man. No way, Jose - Mourinho will bring some much required madness back to the Premier League - 5th June
 * Where’s Sally and her *innocent face* when you need them? - 3rd June
 * So Theresa May and Sayeeda Warsi want to ban the preachers of hate? On the contrary, bring 'em on - The asbestos of publicity doesn't fan the flames of a vicious dogma into a raging inferno, it first retards them, and then inflicts a fatal malignancy - 29th May
 * Melanie Philips shone a torch on darkness and revealed herself - Ms Phillips found mirth in the aftermath of Woolwich - 27th May
 * Ed Miliband is staring at an open goal and I know just the pair of strikers to win it for him - Miliband, Cameron and Clegg are civilised creatures without a shred of malice between them. This is why they seem so inadequate to the demands of demented political age - 22nd May
 * Congratulations to Andrew Feldman on his appointment as Prime Ministerial Tennis Partner - 20th May
 * This latest EU Tory party squabble has sent David Cameron into a tailspin and he can't stop spinning - What point can there possibly be in trying to decipher Mr Cameron’s thinking? He is not thinking at all. All he is doing is obeying the primary animal instinct for survival - 15th May
 * Iain Duncan Smith - smarter than Joey from ‘Friends’, but blind to the truth - Who will hire a man unable to differentiate fact from fiction? - 13th May
 * Why do we prop up an industry destroying lives across Britain? - The digital roulette offered on fixed odds betting terminals is gambling's crack cocaine - 8th May
 * A party political broadcast by the Tories: prison’s like a holiday camp - In its footling way, this low-level bullying of inmates is undoubtedly good politics - 1st May
 * Why must the Johnson family cloak themselves in obscurity? - 29th April
 * Luis Suarez shows we can't expect a sport as amoral as football to show any teeth - It would be crazy to understate the significance of this show of babyish spite. Perhaps Lord Hutton should be recalled from retirement to head a full judicial inquiry - 23rd April
 * Champion of underdog battles for MPs’ rights to 38 per cent pay hike - Transport minister confirms his neo-Thatcherite instinct for honing in on the electorate’s paramount concerns - 22nd April
 * Introducing Maggie, the consensual PM - Francis Maude gave a contender for the Most Balanced Thatcher eulogy this weekend. Plus, why Lady T was an (almost) total supporter of democr - 15th April
 * The callousness of today's politics is Margaret Thatcher's true legacy - History may conclude otherwise, but today no political legacy looks a sadder victim of the law of unintended consequences than Margaret Thatcher’s - 10th April
 * Prepare your lachrymals for the heart-rending tale of Iain Duncan Smith's trying months of hardship - 8th April
 * Boris would be a disastrous PM. So why do I quite like the idea? - It's mortifying to feel this way, but perhaps Boris is exactly what this country needs... - 29th March
 * Poor Boris - did Eddie really have to be so mean? - The Mayor of London, to whom personal ambition is anathema, was subjected to leadership speculation beneath his dignity - 25th March
 * 'Mr Speaker, let me level with the House...' The Budget Speech George Osborne would like to make - "I was veering towards the conventional torrent of gibberish, then I saw the Shadow Chancellor giving me one his hand gestures, and I changed my mind." - 21st March
 * Why is the Mouth of Humber silent on phone-hacking? - In welcoming John Prescott to the Sunday Mirror in January with an interview, the headline “I Can Speak My Mind Like Never Before” said it all - 18th March
 * Not since the 1980s have our leaders so cruelly bullied the poor - The new Archbishop should beware the IDS of March – or he may come to regret it - 13th March
 * Was Vicky Pryce foolish to trust a journalist's advice?- 11th March
 * Tories sick of the Prime Minister reckon May Day is fast approaching - There is something weirdly appealing about her transition from tortoise to hare - 6th March
 * Alan Sugar vs Richard Desmond: a bare-knuckle battle of the egos - These titans of commerce had a boardroom fracas that should be replayed on live television. Plus, is Andrew Mitchell in line for Peter Mandelson's old job? - 4th March
 * Pack off Nick Clegg and send for Vince! Only a total Cleggectomy can save the Lib Dems now - Now that muted public contempt has mutated into raucous public derision, the moment is surely ripe for the Lib Dem musical. Charles Hawtrey can play Lembit Opik - 27th February
 * Cry freedom for the Solzhenitsyn of Wapping! - Our diarist on a PR man to die for; unfortunate lead times for a magazine keen on Nick Clegg's honesty; and the marvellous wit of John Sessions; and Blade Runner revisited - 25th February
 * Kate Middleton needs more friends like Hilary Mantel - This was a venom-free cri de coeur, as anyone who read it would have spotted - 20th February
 * North Korea: A nuclear tragedy which plays out as comedy - As South Park's creators noted, there is something so funny about this country's rulers it can mask the monstrosity of their regime. We might die laughing - 13th February
 * Is Eastleigh ready for the fastest politician in the West? - Even as Chris Huhne, whose actress mother voiced the Speaking Clock, waits to hear what the time – sponsored by Accurist – will be, David Cameron (pictured) prepares to visit his vacated seat of Eastleigh later this week - 11th February
 * Chris Huhne: A punishment that doesn’t fit the crime - Which emotion moves you more in this morality play: schadenfreude or sympathy? - 5th February
 * Rupert Murdoch links sympathy for Palestinians to anti-Semitism. The truth is more complex - Wishing an end to Palestinian suffering is not synonymous with willing the annihilation of Israel, so why is this distinction so hard to make? - 30th January
 * Adam Afriyie? Good luck to him. He'll need it - The Sunday papers were buzzing with news that Britain's alleged answer to Barack Obama is launching an audacious bid to topple David Cameron. But, er, who is he? - 28th January
 * Poor Prince Harry - or should I say Captain Wales? - is as much a victim of fate as anyone he commands - He's an emblem of an infantilised age, and poster boy for video-game warfare - 23rd January
 * If only Lance Armstrong had given Alastair Campbell warning about his drug-taking past - Our diarist notes that Tony Blair's former spin doctor was a particularly devoted worshipper of the disgraced former Tour de France winner. Funny, that - 21st January
 * IDS’s rebirth is one of the wonders of the age - Widely mocked in the past, the current Work and Pension's Secretary has been tasked with carrying out the Tories loathsome welfare reforms - 2nd January



Articles: 2012

 * Monday diary: Has Jon Gaunt loved the Police Federation to death? - This PR maestro, hired to advise the police over Plebgate, has questions to answer - 24th December
 * The toughest question for Cameron come 2015: how to solve a problem like Ukip? - The Prime Minister can no longer ignore Nigel Farage and his party - 19th December
 * Amid the school shooting horror, CNN advertises to the converted - Plus: Owen Paterson vs Biddes For Botties, Richard Littlejohn's exquisite turn of phrase and please give generously to The Rebekah Brooks Appeal - 17th December
 * Sorry Mr Cameron, Television debates are not optional - The PM's choic this week to launch a bid to weedle out of pre-election live debates in 2015 makes a handsome Christmas gift to Ed Miliband - 12th December
 * Labour's John Mann sure knows how to kick a man when he's down. Just ask (Labour's) Ed Balls - Our Monday diarist on Labour rentaquotes, Boris's sister, and Romney on the ropes - 10th December
 * George Osborne's Autumn Statement will mean a winter of discontent for the disabled - The Chancellor has no intention of tackling multinational tax avoiders and the people after whom Mr Osborne is actually going have no cunning tax lawyers to defend them - 5th December
 * Diary: Ironically, Archbishop forgives The Sun its trespasses - Today's diary looks at The Archbishop of York, Leveson and Alan Sugar - 3rd December
 * Leveson's flawed inquiry proves that press freedom is too important be left to the mercy of politicians - As the esteemed judge passes sentence on the media, our whole industry lives in sickly terror of the noose. What terrors might he loose upon us? - 28th November
 * Blairite loyalists like myself know that Mr Tony Blair only consorts with the nicest dictators around - Rwandans, rejoice! The former Prime Minister is keen to spread goodwill and cheer. For evidence of how that works out, just take a look at the Middle East - 26th November
 * When it comes to the EU, the Government isn't sleepwalking, it's lurching like a crazy drunk - If the PM must engage in the sort of brinksmanship that may take us over the brink, it would be awfully decent of him to tell us why - 21st November
 * Thank heaven Tory relations with the police are so cordial, or Lynton Crosby might be in trouble - That "f***ing Muslims" comment; just what is Murdoch on about?; and the latest outing for the Mail's voodoo doll, Samantha Brick - 19th November
 * Newsnight, Rupert Murdoch, and why we only lambast the BBC because we love it so much - Any institution the size of this Corporation will face major crises from time to time. But few have represented the best of us so vividly for 90 years - 14th November
 * Diary: Entwistle was helped onto his sword by the brilliant John Humphrys - Today's diary looks at who's left the BBC, who the bookies think will be next, and and the thoroughly unedifiying gloating of Rupert Murdoch - 12th November
 * This election wasn't pretty, but Obama's victory is a triumph for science over superstition - In the aftermath Karl Rove, and the delusional wing of the Republican party, will be forced still deeper into their reality-defying bunker - 8th November
 * It was the Governor wot lost it for Mitt, moans Murdoch - The GOP blame game, Rupert's mental enfeeblement, Mad Mel's latest conspiracy and Yvette Cooper's wardrobe malfunction - 5th November
 * Romney was outclassed by Obama, but it’s still all to play for in the US presidential elections - Obamaniacs are hopeful, but three debates in and the outcome of the election remains as clear as mud, and not just any old mud - 24th October
 * Diary: Black’s back and he’s ready for Merton, Hislop and libel - Today's diary looks at Cameron, Mitchell, and an agony aunt who refused to report a paedophile because he was a family friend - 21st October
 * Thank goodness Britain is such a different country from that in which Jimmy Savile got away with it - This is not a country that lightly yields its rose-tinted spectacles. So we should be grateful to this scandal for illuminating how far we've come - 17th October
 * Tony Blair's tormentor comes back to... torment him - Our weekly diarist on the fate of his former favourite columnist, the latest goings-on with Louise Mensch, and an inspired choice for Headline of the Week - 15th October
 * It's not just the Tories gathered in Birmingham who know Boris Johnson is unstoppable now - Prime Minister David Cameron is up against a force of nature that nothing can stop. The only dilemma for Boris is over when exactly to launch his coup - 10th October
 * What Jeremy Hunt – the Cabinet's Manuel – did next - Who could have known? Who would possibly have guessed that in Jeremy *unt's promotion to Health Secretary lay seeds that would soon flower into problems for the PM? - 8th October
 * Blessed are the speechmakers. Just get it right - Public speaking may terrify ordinary homo sapiens but for the likes of Romney, Obama and Miliband (homo egomaniacus) it comes as naturally as breathing - 3rd October
 * Courageous Kelvin is a delicate petal - The shadow of poverty looms in Ed Miliband's conference speech; Boris scores an own goal on World Cup '66, and an apology to the Church of Scientology - 1st October
 * DJ Mike Read, the future of Ukip - Danny leaves the Lib Dems with a mountain to climb; Mitchell's word vs The Sweeny and could Mel 'n' Mitt be a match made in heaven? - 24th September
 * Unambitious? Are you taking the Michael? - Michael Gove insists that he would never under any circumstances accept the Tory leadership. Could it really be he means exactly what he says? - 19th September
 * How the man of Straw revisited his finest hour - What the former Home Secretary might have done about policing; the silliness of Melanie Phillips (cont'd); and a bit else besides - 17th September
 * Cameron's carve-up reveals just how limp he has become - The neutering of Ken Clarke is a monstrous error that will retoxify the Tories - 5th September
 * Will it be off with his Ed, or bye George? - How both now deal with their economic supremos will do much to decide the election - 29th August
 * Has Obama just been handed victory on a plate? - Romney may wish to frame the election as a choice about the budget. But the true battle is ideological - 15th August
 * Homer of darts deserves his own legacy - Without Sid Waddell, darts could never have become such a ratings banker - 13th August
 * Even a doormat can only take so much abuse - Like Diana, Clegg's role was to look innocent and pretty - and to humanise Cameron - 8th August
 * It's Tom Daley's Twitter tormentor who needs the law's protection - Whatever is already a crime is a crime no matter what medium is used to commit it - 1st August
 * My advice to Mitt Romney – do mention the horse - If Raisa’s jockey edges away, Mitt must call his wife over to tell him about her dressage horse, Rafalca - 25th July
 * Please don't forget why Blair is a pariah in his own land - A myth takes shape that the former PM is dishonoured in his own land, that he was kicked out too soon - 18th July
 * An embarrassing game of political football - It's anyone's guess if their row was any more edifying than John Terry's badinage with Anton Ferdinand - 11th July
 * How often does Vince Cable have to be right before they make him Chancellor? - Cable has left Osborne for dead as a repository for public faith in matters economic - 4th July
 * The US, not Europe, is the enemy of our rights - If David Cameron wants to pick a worthwhile fight, he might retrain his guns on this one-sided treaty - 27th June
 * Let Jimmy Carr's hypocrisy be a timely lesson to the Chancellors - The central question is how in the name of all the saints it is legal at all for individuals to avoid tax - 20th June
 * Charging in, Black Night is unhorsed by three little letters - In honour of his latest brave foray into the treacherous arena of droll badinage, a new analogy for Alastair Campbell is needed - 18th June
 * The brooding, tortured soul of Gordon Brown - He retains his gift, as in the election that never was, for plucking defeat from the oesophagus of victory - 13th June
 * After 60 years, at last the country seems at ease with itself - Most gratifying of all was the weekend's dearth of smugness and triumphalism - 6th June
 * Be bold, Ed – bring Alistair Darling back into the fold - Among rogues, fools and braggarts he shone out as a beacon of calm integrity and decency - 16th May
 * Blame the Greeks. They invented democracy - Levels of poverty and unemployment unseen since the 1930s pose a mortal threat to our political system - 9th May
 * Now that the Prime Minister's lost his charm, what's left? - Dennis Skinner doesn't deserve contempt of cocky whippersnappers - 2nd May
 * As ever with Rupert Murdoch, we have an immorality tale worthy of Don Corleone - We do not know which version of the mogul will turn up at Leveson. We do know that he will be more reprehensible than his son - 25th April
 * Matthew Norman on Monday: A Ukip alliance? Murdoch may have news for Leveson... - Here's one to file under the header of Idiotic Predictions Not Worth a Second Thought, assuming it merits a first thought, but is Rupert Murdoch preparing to put The Sun's electoral weight behind Ukip? - 23rd April
 * At this rate we'll be getting Ed as PM by default - The ritual disclaimer that Cameron is too clever to be underestimated begins to look outmoded - 18th April
 * Spying on us all isn't just daft, it's the act of a PM with no beliefs - You either believe in the primacy of liberty, or you do not. The belief is not negotiable - 4th Apri
 * Surely Cameron is in line for a Michelin star? - If the PM's genius is worth £250,000 a pop, he must make Heston Blumenthal look like the Crossroads chef - 28th March
 * tragedy is not its leader – it's the shadow Chancellor'' - Were Yvette Cooper the opponent, I can't believe Osborne would risk this tax cut braggadocio - 21st March
 * The paradox of our obsession with long life - The crucial question is the one posed by Queen. Who wants to live forever? Or so joylessly it feels that way? - 14th March
 * Now we know – the Met was institutionally corrupt as well - They knew prosecuting Davidson would focus attention on the Stephen Lawrence murder investigation - 7th March
 * Let us never forget the stench of this rank corruption - Leveson is no evil plot to stifle genuine reporting. We're staring at a tornado of organised crime - 29th February
 * Could hosepipe bans rip the Union asunder? - Alex Salmond would seek to inveigle a chunk of sub-Saharan England to join a Greater Caledonia - 22nd February
 * There's always the Human Rights Act, Trevor - To think of the halcyon days when Kavanagh rejoiced at Thatcher unleashing the police on Wapping strikers - 15th February
 * Obama has nothing to fear from this freakshow - The GOP is putting on a Tea Party-backed, smash hit revival of 'One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest' - 1st February
 * Somebody's got to stick up for Chris Huhne... - He would have made an infinitely braver champion than Nick Clegg of his party's core beliefs - 25th January
 * Cameron is the David Brent of welfare reform - The PM seems to be happy to leave the disabled behind - 18th January
 * If politics is like sex, Ed will never find the national G-spot - For all the good that his 'relaunch' will do him, Miliband might as well have spoken in Klingon - 11th January



Articles: 2011

 * Bradley Manning - the prisoner who exposes American hypocrisy - If we had no right to see US helicopter pilots gunning down civilians, what right do we have to know anything? - 21st December
 * Clegg is helping his enemies to annihilate his own party - How he compounded his error by failing to foresee his colleagues' fury, God alone knows - 14th December
 * Do unethical lobbyists feel any pain at the dirty, seedy role they play in politics? - For all the Michelin meals, first-class air travel and fat salaries, they are not to be envied - 7th December
 * Rest in peace, Gary – the tabloids have shut up - Even a month ago, the red-top papers would have gorged themselves on a speculative feeding frenzy - 30th November
 * What world are the Republicans living in? - There isn't space to catalogue the recent hilarities provided by GOP presidential wannabes - 23rd November
 * Margaret Thatcher is still big, it's the politicians that got small - The timing of the release of 'The Iron Lady' has a resonance that transcends normal critical criteria - 15th November
 * Not quite Smokin' Ed, but he's landing punches - As we enter the middle rounds of this parliament, it strikes me that too many of us wrote off Miliband too soon - 10th November
 * Has Cameron's lucky streak just run out? - A bad week for the PM has implanted long-term doubts about his judgement - 26th October
 * GPs - like glorified plumbers... - ... Only with shorter hours - 19th October
 * Who are we to demonise a man who inspires such loyalty? - If Liam Fox became a manager at McDonald's, Adam Werritty would pop up asking, 'Fries with that?' - 12th October
 * You can get away with being loathed – but not ridiculed - For Chris Christie, the presidential bandwagon crashed yesterday - 5th October
 * It really doesn't matter what Ed said - For all the triangulating between baddies rich and poor, Miliband will never be the Bill Clinton of Hampstead - 28th September
 * The Met chief's error was elementary - The real story here is not one of a threat to press freedom but one of monumental police stupidity - 21st September
 * a benign dictator would struggle to tackle this sickness'' - Perhaps this is the time for a little utopian thinking - 17th August
 * celebrities swap jobs...'' - ... career suicide ensues - 15th August
 * biggest test has arrived...'' - ... Is he up to the job? - 10th August
 * always Christmas in Rebekah's world'' - Join me in celebrating Murdoch's metamorphosis from Herod into Jesus - 8th August
 * unmaking of a President'' - Governing in prose is one thing. Preferring weasel words to governing at all is another - 3rd August
 * change of leader that is the Lib Dems' only hope'' - The Rt Hon Dr Vince Cable: an apology - 27th July
 * Johnson embodies the amorality of the passing age'' - Now is the time for all good menches to come to the aid of the party - 20th July
 * pity Gordon...'' - ... he supped from the devil's hands - 13th July
 * is the moment to stop Murdoch'' - It beggars all belief that the BSkyB takeover might still be permitted. It will be a staggering disgrace, after this, if it is - 6th July
 * America's plight so terrible that it would lurch this far?'' - Bachmann's mouth is a reliable launch pad for astounding foolishness - 29th June
 * true hero and his fan in Burma'' - Why bother with that costly journalism when the BBC World Service could revert to Reithian values and fill the airtime with Kajagoogoo? - 23rd June
 * on David Miliband for dragging his party down'' - A compelling lesson as to why Labour was absolutely right to reject him - 15th June
 * mind the economy...'' - ... I'll be watching Rooney's growth - 8th June
 * it's a game without rules...'' - ... chaos is inevitable - 25th May
 * least our papers don't pander to the political elite'' - The French and English have fought tigerishly for centuries on many terrains - 18th May
 * the interests of his party, Clegg must walk the plank'' - But his Icarus-style descent isn't fair - 11th May
 * has shown the world why it fell in love with him'' - He is not the Messiah, but he deserves to sleep easy in his bed - 4th May
 * law's not just an ass, it's a superass'' - All that may be said in Andrew Marr's defence is that he has unwittingly done much to crystallise a difficult argument - 27th April
 * empire's shocking decline and fall'' - The America at which we glance across the ocean today is shrinking before our eyes. It is bamboozled and petrified - 20th April
 * are heroes of comedy...'' - ... and there's Frankie Boyle - 6th April
 * by the right-wing press dooms any sensible debate on drugs'' - The issue is one of political courage, or rather, its absence under fire - 30th March
 * a black face in Midsomer would be tokenism'' - The fact is that between town and country there is a colossal disconnect - 16th March
 * second term is safe...'' - ... Republicans will see to that - 9th March
 * over it Dave, we're not a world power any more'' - We suck up to the gerontocracy of Beijing, closing our eyes to its filthy human rights abuses because China is doing what nonation has done before - 2nd March
 * of Labour greed that are a gift to Cameron'' - Miliband and Balls are seeking to impose the control freakery that Blair pioneered - 23rd February
 * the PM is such an idealist let's see him out volunteering'' - The moment he described Big Society as 'my mission', a question was begged - 16th February
 * expects hypocrisy...'' - ... but the amateurism is unforgivable - 9th February
 * prescription is an epitaph'' - The Chancellor starts to look like a brutally arrogant oncologist - 2nd February
 * the tornado, Murdoch will still be left standing'' - So here we are enjoying another wild ride on the crazy, crazy merry-go-round - 26th January
 * will out for Coulson and Blair...'' - ... but don't hold your breath - 19th January
 * hope Alan Johnson doesn't get asked about stamp duty'' -The mood music at which Johnners can excel is important - 12th January

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Articles: 2010

 * very clever twit – and a proud man'' - By the narrowest of margins Vince Cable's political neck has, for now, avoided being placed in a noose - 22nd December
 * sacking must surely be on Cameron's Christmas list'' - The autocratic Mrs Thatcher would have fired Clarke in an instant - 15th December
 * back Westminster's Barbra Streisand'' - The public may not love Mandy, but they respect his intellect - 24th November
 * isn't what we expect from our monarchs'' - I can't imagine Kate Middleton having the captain of the England rugby team smuggled into Kensington Palace in the boot of a car - 17th November
 * did this wastrel ever find his way to the White House?'' - Bush has the self-awareness of a bison - 10th November
 * Widdecombe, the prisoners' pin-up. Who'd have thought it?'' - Thanks to 'Strictly', she has left Michael Howard in the nocturnal darkness - 3rd November
 * Johnson is just the man for the battle Labour must fight'' - Ed Miliband has done little wrong as leader, and one crucial thing right - 27th October
 * next, trigger-less rifles?'' - Here’s a suggestion for the Secretary of State. Good doctor, turn the aircraft-less carriers into museums themed on our imperial past. In spirit, that’s what they are anyway - 20th October
 * Topshop style'' - The state can hardly be seen to send suppliers into receivership by staunching their cash flow - 13th October
 * the masochist tendency'' - For all the whiff of born-to-punish superiority that clings indeliby to the Chancellor, this is a politician of a selflessness that verges on the uncanny - 6th October
 * Balls or Yvette Cooper? Balls to the both of them'' - Ed Miliband must frustrate the ambitions of his party's power couple - 3rd October
 * time may yet come'' - Could Barack Obama conclude that an old enemy is better placed to safeguard America from Republican madness, and walk away with dignity, as well as relief? - 29th September
 * helluva scary witch'' - A return to the subject of the Tea Party's Christine O'Donnell seems less a temptation than a moral imperative - 22nd September
 * the US comes a nasty whiff'' - The misfortunes of others being the greatest solace in gloomy, scary times, God bless the United States of America! - 15th September
 * is the only real man in Labour race'' - With the exception of Diane Abbott, this has been the Castrati Election - 1st September
 * who knows better about social mobility?'' - Promoted to the Cabinet in the misapprehension that he is the grandson of Jackie Milburn, whom Mr Tony Blair saw at St James's Park while a foetus, Wor Alan is an inspired choice - 16th August
 * zenith of our celebrity culture'' - Even Radio 4 could summon the strength to lead bulletins with the trial only once Campbell made her way to The Hague - 12th August
 * now, do try to keep it clean, Nadine'' - Troublesome as BP has found stopping that Gulf of Mexico gush, David Cameron may find it harder to staunch the flow from the honeyed mouth of Nadine Dorries - 9th August
 * an enigma instead of a leader'' - One minute the President is a cool, aloof sophisticate. The next he strikes a tone of synthetic moral outrage - 4th August
 * wonder Nick's poll ratings are plummeting'' - With any potentially transformative national event, our guide is the Chinese communist who, asked about the impact the French Revolution almost two centuries later, said it was too soon to tell - 2nd August
 * needs another Dave'' - With David Miliband as Labour leader, Mr Clegg would be a happy self-auctioneer - 28th July
 * the carping and give volunteering a go'' - Get Pickles cleaning bins, Fox delivering babies, May counselling prostitutes, and Osborne wallpapering care homes in Tatton. We know they're busy. That's the point - 22nd July
 * least inspiring contest ever'' - Will this apology for a Labour leadership campaign never cease? - 14th July
 * the benefits scrounger'' - There generally comes a point in the life of the addict when self-deception becomes unsustainable - 7th July
 * step that should have been too far'' - Even those of us who sniffed the Lib Dems' distant death on the first breeze of coalition must today be gagging - 30th June
 * football says about a country'' - It is not the fear of losing that does them in. It's the fear of winning - 18th June
 * and the memoirs'' - The traditional adverb to descibe the haste with which the newly box-deprived are scrambling to burden bookshelves is 'unseemly'. It doesn't go far enough - 9th June
 * Maj has rarely made me happier'' - Has ever a nation gazed upon its sovereign and murmured "Gawd bless you, Ma'am" as reverently? - 26th May
 * at war – it's a Jewish thing'' -Ed shows the appetite for conflict that is essential in an Opposition leader - 19th May
 * Clegg. Damned if he did...'' - From the moment that exit poll proved anything but a rogue, the Lib Dem leader was lost - 12th May
 * had our chance, and we blew it'' - We have been every bit as smug and apathetic as the politicians - 8th May
 * Gordon, the torment will be over'' - The Prime Minister has been as complex and compelling a psychological study as any politician in my lifetime - 5th May
 * Blinky consign Labour to history?'' - If Ed Balls has a political philosophy, it is the domineering, top-down, we-know-best infantilising statism of Gordon himself - 28th April
 * on Dave, don't be chicken'' - This wondrously unpredictable election campaign has its first incontestable winner - 21st April
 * Clegg must move in for the kill'' - With this election, ignorance truly is bliss. Not only does nobody have a clue how it will evolve, but for once no one even pretends to have a clue. And it's wonderful. The combat sport of politics has become hugely exciting, and that's change we can all believe in - 21st April
 * the geriatrics wot will win the Ovaltine Election'' - This is not a young country, but a very old one that is feeling its age more than ever - 31st March
 * charming symmetry of latest New Labour scandal'' - Small wonder if Tony Blair quivers like a malaria victim who has lost his quinine - 24th March
 * have thought Cameron had learned from Blair's past'' - The message is that leadership by tiny clique, besides poor, is wildly unpopular - 17th March
 * stoppable force and a moveable object'' - Post-election mayhem is now the most promising outcome - 10th March
 * would Foot have made of it now?'' - He was the last great bridgehead to an age when politicians fought for their beliefs - 5th March
 * magnificent in the sufferings of Brown'' - Gordon is no bully. The primary victim of his unsuitedness to be PM is himelf - 24th February
 * Gosling – the voice of humanity'' - The broadcaster has committed a noble act of civil disobedience - as well as of mercy - 17th February
 * and cuckolder – the perfect England captain'' - We should quit moral high ground and let John Terry get on with being captain - 3rd February
 * always a pariah'' - The former PM will never escape the verdict of the court of public opinion - 27th January

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Articles: 2009

 * is a terrible reverse, but don't write off Obama'' - There is discontent about the US economy. But that is expected to improve dramatically - 21st January
 * will take more than Chilcot to nail Campbell'' - As the warm-up man for Tony Blair, he was perfect - 13th January
 * needs bringing to life. This might do the trick'' - A TV debate makes the next election even more fascinating and hard to call - 23rd December
 * up children shames us'' - The lasting damage caused at Yarl's Wood is apparently not our problem - 17th December
 * about a supertax on Blair?'' - The ex-PM mirrors the bankers in seeming to be rewarded for poor judgement - 10th December
 * vs Mercy: the impossible conflict behind Demjanjuk's trial'' - The question is not whether he's guilty, but if justice is served by trying him now - 3rd December
 * on Palin St'' - It is her status as the apotheosis of reality televison that explains her popularity - 26th November
 * wonder the Queen raised an eyebrow while she read it'' - She may not be a genius but she's clever enough to know that she's parroting gibberish - 19th November
 * is a God'' - He has no need to play God. On Greek mythological lines, he is one - 12th November
 * Johnson - addicted to power'' - The Home Secretary has become dependent on something very nasty - 5th November
 * it time Gordon Brown was put out of his misery?'' - Everything this reverse Midas touches turns to plutonium - 29th October
 * all the New Labour toadies, Jack Straw must be the worst'' - His entire career is a gruesome paradigm of the enfeeblement of Westminster politcs - 23rd October
 * Jan Moir, I'm nearly lost for words'' - Diary: Even by Mail standards, Jan's censoriousness is astonishing, and the instant response has been spectacular - 19th October
 * of the best is just what they needed'' - The dunces who are our MPs still cannot grasp that they have been naughty - 15th October
 * gamble might just pay off'' - The shadow chancellor trusts the public's realism about the pickle we're in - 8th October
 * perfect New Labour scandal'' - It's as an unwitting yet talented seamstress that I'll remember Baroness Scotland - 24th September
 * should be praised not banned'' - They contribute many billions more to the economy than they take in healthcare - 17th September
 * for months of dreary torture (and pass the pills)'' - The script for the period between now and the next election is already written - 10th September
 * Brown sinks, Mandelson rides the crest of a wave'' - Mamma Mia, there he goes again - 6th August
 * insanity and enduring racism of the American right'' - The Republicans now make the Tories at their worst seem achingly inclusive - 30th July
 * sycophancy and hostile action over Afghanistan'' - George Foulkes may be the most hilarious courtier that even New Labour has produced - 23rd July
 * herder Gordon has lost his tribe'' - Leaders prefer to populate the cabinet farmyard almost exclusively with sheep - 16th July
 * handed down in tabloids of stone'' - Not since Captain Renault told Rick “I am shocked, shocked to find that gambling is going on in here”, as he collected his roulette winnings in Casablanca, has there been anything like it - 13th July
 * might be crazy, but could she end up in the White House?'' - Palin should have said she was giving up politics to spend less time with her family - 9th July
 * where is our Chancellor hiding?'' - He seems to be intent on going down as the biggest pussy ever to hold an office of state - 2nd July
 * Prince and his indulgent public'' - We seem to have outgrown the idea that royals are crucial to our sense of self-worth - 25th June
 * can see it now: 'President Blair''' - A new EU post is so perfectly suited to the former PM that it makes you wince - 18th June
 * Sugar will see you now Gordon'' - With Esther on the electoral rampage and Fiona Phillips feeling vindicated at rejecting the offer of a government job, who'd have guessed that the first beloved TV figure to make the political breakthrough would be Alan Sugar? - 8th June
 * are witnessing a very British form of anarchy'' - There is only blind panic and frantic plotting by members of a headless party - 4th June
 * a written constitution will do'' - In the constitutional context, 'unwritten' is the euphamism for 'non-existent' - 28th May
 * need a Speaker elected by the people for the people'' - It says much about the Commons' sunken state that there isn't a compelling candidate - 21st May
 * hail Heffer, the new Oliver Cromwell'' - The last time the House of Commons sank so low, a Hercules came forth from the east to muck out the stables ... but could it happen again? I refer to my friend Simon Heffer. Many cracking pieces about MPs' expenses have been published in recent days, but few have matched Simon's work in The Daily Telegraph for clinical, laser-directed wrath - 18th May
 * must seize the moment to demand a written constitution'' - Not for the first time, but more now than ever, I commend to you V For Vendetta - 14th May
 * we'll all miss Jacqui Smith'' - Her decision to ban a US shock jock demands yet another Home Office dunce's cap - 7th May
 * Lib Dems may miss their chance'' - What a masterstroke if Clegg declared that he was ready to swap jobs with his deputy - 1st May
 * lend me your smears'' - In journalism, as elsewhere, the ability to hold one's nerve underfire is a rare quality, and must never be allowed to pass uncommended - 27th April
 * police fiasco to divert attention from the last one'' - The Pakistanis haven't been released but held for deporting - 24th April
 * outrage counts for nothing'' - Fury at politicians is a noble emotion, and a moral imperative. But it won't change things - 2nd April
 * haunted PM, marooned on fantasy island'' - Not since Howe launched his cricket metaphor have we seen such an attack - 26th March
 * of the class, Mr Lammy'' - The higher education minister displays a psychosis-inducing complacency - 19th March
 * suffer contempt from all sides'' - Protests against the military are shameful. But the Government's conduct is no better - 12th March
 * us into the 51st state? Why not?'' - The upsides of the UK becoming part of the US would more than dwarf regrets - 5th March
 * fear even Obama can't save Brown'' - It's hard to imagine what the PM can tell Congress that won't sound absurd - 26th February
 * patients are always ‘brave’...'' - ... In Jade’s case, it’s true - 19th February
 * says there's no use for Gordon?'' - The PM has turned into a human landfill site for his party's toxic perceptions - 12th February
 * Carol – you just don't get it'' - Ignorance is no defence and those who defend her only show their own ignorance - 5th February
 * save our anger for real scandals'' - There's a sickness far more threatening than alleged avarice in Westminster - 29th January
 * after all that, did Bush ever really have any convictions?'' - Term ends without him leaving any impression of what he believes - 15th January
 * world-beaters when it comes to sporting incompetence'' - The ECB boost Australia's morale - 8th January

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Articles: 2008

 * threw shoes at Brown – but his guilt is still undeniable'' - The Prime Minister shares in the responsibility for the crime that is Iraq - 18th December 2008
 * takes a rich man to pour such scorn on the poor'' - As the disability defiant Churchill would agree, an army must carry its wounded - 11th December 2008
 * written constitution is the answer'' - Jacqui Smith is Brown’s lightning rod when it’s the PM we should be frazzling - 4th December 2008
 * how liberalism's enemies embrace it when they need it - Jon Gaunt now lionises the very human rights he has derided for so long - 27th November 2008 (see: Humbled by support of old 'enemy' Shami'' - Jon Gaunt - The Sun - 28th November 2008)
 * can't afford mistakes. But nor can he play it safe'' - The Tory leader is walking a tightrope without the flimsiest of safety nets - 20th November 2008
 * you want your child to share America's moment'' - I tried to explain to the 11-year-old why we were moved to tears - 6th November 2008
 * to the BBC: stay calm in a crisis'' - The Ross/Brand episode isn't edifying. But nor is it a matter for prime ministers - 30th October 2008
 * possessed Osborne to pick a fight with Mandelson?'' - This is Westminster's answer to Stendhal Syndrome - 23rd October 2008
 * home Lord Mandy'' - It might be Awakenings, with Gordon reviving the narcoleptics - 16th October 2008
 * tragedy of this flawed hero'' - For one whose single rhetorical flourish is the gratingly incessant appellation "My friends", John McCain has very few left - 10th October 2008
 * you're a joke, you're doomed'' - The most lethal warhead in the anti-politician armoury is humour not hatred - 3rd October 2008
 * you want politics with real drama, look to America'' - The presidential debates represent the purest distillation of democracy there is - 25th September 2008
 * back to the Treasury, Gordon'' - Imagine the impact if the PM quit in order to return to the job he does best. What’s he got to lose? - 18th September 2008
 * are the police allowed to be a law unto themselves?'' - The problem is that we have no clue what the force is up to, and no mechanism to find out - 11th September 2008
 * would be better than Brown – even Kerry Katona'' - The mystery is why enough doubt persists for Charles Clarke to feel obliged to launch another Exocet - 5th September 2008
 * drama and democracy'' - Barack Obama at the Democratic Convention - 29th August 2008
 * life is destroyed. So why hound Gary Glitter?'' - 22nd August 2008
 * Cameron tackles the great unmentionable - 18th July 2008
 * Obama a belief-free zone? I don't believe so - 11th July 2008
 * Welcome back, Keith! We've missed you!! - 4th July 2008
 * An act of dispossession that shames Britain - 27th June 2008
 * Prepare for the second wave of Obamania - 20th June 2008
 * We are the world leaders in ineptitude - 13th June 2008
 * Has McClellan handed victory to Obama? - 30th May 2008
 * Courage is knowing when to stand down - 23rd May 2008
 * These petty buffoons who ruled over us - 16th May 2008
 * American democracy in all its filthy glory - 9th May 2008
 * Gordon has shown who's really in charge - 2nd May 2008
 * Another step on the road to disaster - 25th April 2008
 * Gordon must marry Lily (or possibly Keira) - 18th April 2008
 * So is Ed Balls ready for the big fight? - 11th April 2008
 * The warmest welcome for a tyrant-in-exile - 4th April 2008
 * The policy that shames our country - 28th March 2008
 * The audacity of treating voters like adults - 21st March 2008
 * Nick Clegg and the art of self-destruction - 7th March 2008
 * The only tears for Hillary are her own - 29th February 2008
 * Gordon just needs a good night's sleep - 22nd February 2008
 * Democracy's a bitch – and then you die - 8th February 2008
 * One law for MPs, another for the rest of us - 1st February 2008
 * Ken: a hideous hybrid of Blair and Brown - 25th January 2008
 * Why not let MPs go on strike for more pay? - 18th January 2008
 * From anti-apartheid hero to New Labour amnesiac - Sunday 13th January 2008
 * The Blairs and the Clintons: divided at last - 11th January 2008

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The Independent:
Column name: Media Diary

Remit/Info: Media issues

Section: Media

Role: Commentator

Pen-name:

Email: [mailto:m.norman@independent.co.uk m.norman@independent.co.uk]

Personal website:

Website: Media/Matthew Norman

Commissioning editor:

Day published: Thursday

Regularity: Weekly

Column format:

Average length:

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Articles: 2010

 * Huw saying, Fiona?'' - Hearty congrats to Fiona Bruce on her anointment (perhaps a poor choice of word in the context, as fellow piles-martyrs will agree) as 2010's Rear of the Year. Where this leaves Fiona's BBC colleague Huw Edwards is anyone's guess - 17th June
 * Jones, poster girl for Big Society'' - 20th May
 * at war – it's a Jewish thing'' - 20th May
 * Adam and Alastair show'' - 13th May
 * Cowell casts his vote'' - 6th May
 * Aussie rules for Trevor Kavanagh'' - 29th April
 * villainy of bewigged buffoons'' - 5th April
 * of little faith, hark the voice of the Vatican'' - Diary - 29th March
 * would Sigmund make of the Quake over the Cake?'' - 22nd March
 * puts herself on the line for Gordon'' - 15th March
 * take off that nightie, your Honour'' - 8th March
 * academic for high-minded Mr Coulson'' - 1st March
 * the revenge of the Sky News Ninja'' - 22nd February
 * see television as not-quite-crying game'' - 15th February
 * has a fight on his hands to rebuild temple of privacy'' - 8th February
 * now on ITV1, the utterly creepy Adam's family'' - 1st February
 * sorry tale of unrequited love and the Daily Mail'' - 25th January
 * bangs his old drum kit to another rhythm'' - 18th January
 * brickbats and bouquets'' - 11th January

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Articles: 2009

 * justice be seen to complain?'' - 21st December
 * freedom, Black could be back'' - Please don't tempt fate by untying that yellow ribbon from the old oak tree ... but there is a sliver of a chance that Conrad Black will soon be out - 14th December
 * Mandy, you gave without taking'' - If heaven truly loveth a sinner that repenteth, the celestial choir must be singing endless hosannahs today in adoration of Peter Mandelson - 7th December
 * strange business on Cameron's doorstep'' - When David Cameron opened his front door and snippily berated the Daily Mirror reporter requesting his comment on its splash about how much he and colleagues will benefit from Tory inheritance tax policy, did he say: "You should try working for an independent newspaper" or "... The Independent newspaper"? - 30th November
 * contacts book may prove useful, Archie'' - Warmest congrats to ITV on finally concluding its thrilling quest for a new chairman. It’s been a blast these recent months, with a seemingly endless succession of giants touted for the job before vanishing from view - 23rd November
 * can be a bamboozling term'' - Reflecting on a week of unrelenting excitement even by his standards, an indelicate question poses itself about Rupert Murdoch. Is the old boy finally losing it? - 16th November
 * Fry affair was Twitter's first JFK moment'' - Which of us will ever forget where we were when we heard that Stephen Fry had resigned from Twitter? - 9th November
 * it a mutation or a melding of minds?'' - In a metamorphosis worthy of Ovid, new Spectator editor Fraser Nelson is rapidly mutating into his boss Andrew Neil - 2nd November
 * just the start for the David Brent of fascists'' - Never in the field of media endeavour, to adapt the man posthumously sequestered by the BNP, has so much tosh been written by so many about a single wretched nebbish - 26th October
 * a true giant among men'' - Outrage and distress are occupational hazards for those of us who follow the British media, yet I can't recall being quite so upset as I am today by the smearing of our overseer Ben Bradshaw - 12th October
 * U-turn embarrasses Labour'' - Oh the excruciation of a sense of entitlement betrayed. So many and varied are the delights to be savoured from Labour's reaction to The Sun's delicately timed transfer of support that picking a winner feels futile - 5th October
 * woman who can read out loud'' - 28th September
 * historian's excuse: 'I wasn't there''' - 21st September
 * out, Liz – even your colleagues are taking pot shots at you now'' - 14th September
 * grubby gardener’s game for a laugh'' - The tale of Alan Duncan and his not-so-secret gardener underpins the fast-emerging irony about the “surveillance society” - 17th August
 * Yum Yentob sings for his supper'' - After a mixed week for the BBC on the courage-under-fire front, a rousing thank the Lord for Alan Yentob - 10th August
 * the fingernail vs Cam the puppet'' - Here we go again. Every four or five years, without fail, the prospect of a live, televised election scrap between the party leaders is tantalisingly raised, and this time it might even happen - 3rd August
 * Desi's sword of truth'' - These are not words I expected to write without some potent psychotropic substance seeping through an intravenous drip, but Richard Desmond becomes a role model to us all - 27th July
 * BBC chief in need of media training'' - With concerns about BBC ageism intensifying all the time, the fear grows that director general Mark Thompson and trust chairman Michael Lyons will be retired before the fight over "top slicing" the licence fee is resolved - 20th July
 * polygraph test for pompous politicians'' - A spat between Ed Balls and The Spectator's political editor Fraser Nelson suggests a refinement to an old idea about how the media should deal with political whoppers - 6th July
 * to get ahead in hackery...'' - There are many compelling reasons to offer up what was known in her most memorable Sun headline to date (on the death of Dr Harold Shipman) as a rousing "Ship, Ship, Hooray" on Rebekah Wade's ascension to become News International's chief executive - 29th June
 * Shed a tear for the life of Brian'' - As the expenses aftershock continues to radiate, this seems a good moment to stand back and consider what the exes scandal tells us about this industry.Here I am indebted to Brian Binley, the Tory MP who contributed such a splendid piece to Friday’s Independent - 22nd June
 * happy union of Marx and Enoch'' - I am overjoyed to report not only that the neo-Cromwellian ambitions of Simon Heffer thrive, but that in pursuance of them he has formed potentially the most significant left-right axis Britain has known for more than 60 years - 1st June
 * TV Discard Party to clean up politics'' - Things move so quickly in neo-revolutionary Britain, but at the time of writing there is reckoned to be an 80 per cent chance that Esther Rantzen will shortly confirm her intention to contest Margaret Moran's Luton South seat - 25th May
 * last a rival for Humphrys and Paxo'' - The Sun last week devoted many pages to covering the subject of violence committed by women against their men folk. "I want society to understand domestic abuse DOES affect men," said Ian McNicholl, whose former partner has been jailed for seven years for maltreating him horrifically, on the front page - 11th May
 * catches cold as ‘Mail’ goes nuclear'' - The first Swine Flu Article of the Week award of doubtless many goes unreservedly to Christopher Booker in the Daily Mail for "Pandemic or Panic?" Catchily sub-headed "After Salmonella, Bird Flu, the Millennium Bug ... Should We Actually Be Scared This Time?" - 4th May
 * lend me your smears'' - In journalism, as elsewhere, the ability to hold one's nerve underfire is a rare quality, and must never be allowed to pass uncommended - 4th May
 * to stop these tantrums, Boris'' - With Boris Johnson continuing on the trail from journalist to Tory titan, as blazed by Winston Churchill, the thoughts turn to the transformed role in Conservative affairs played by the News of the World - 6th April
 * wounded educationalist such as Alastair would excel as an Etonian housemaster'' - On behalf of an old friend in urgent need of a proper job, I begin with a public appeal. Are you, or do you know, the head of one our leading public schools with a vacancy for the teacher of politics, media studies, modern languages, softly pornographic English literature, intelligence dossier précising or any of the other academic disciplines in which Alastair Campbell is known to excel? - 30th March
 * PCC is backing a new form of journalism – the living obituary'' - The author of a rave review of a restaurant that closed the day before it was published, I am well aware that lead times catch many of us from to time. Last Tuesday's Jade Goody tribute edition, replete with black border and "In loving memory" strapline, was rotten luck for owner Richard Desmond. Some might even wonder whether enticing potential purchasers with the promise of her "final words" should interest the Trade Descriptions boys - 23rd March
 * apprentice's guide to finding a scoop – lift a line from Wikipedia'' - 16th March
 * never really been the word when it comes to blood relatives'' - Every now and then, even those of us who prefer to leave other families to their own lunacy, judging that we have ample of that in our own, are obliged to take sides - 9th March
 * Government might deny it, but the Mail still delivers Labour's agenda'' - 2nd March
 * mad blog is balm for the anguished soul'' - In these irredeemably dismal times, all I can honestly do is ask you – beg you on all fours, in fact, hands grasping your knees in frenzied imprecation – to take advantage of the finest non-chemical upper available to humanity. I refer, of course, to Melanie Phillips’s Spectator website-hosted blog - 23rd February
 * watchdog bites back at toothless claim'' - It is with some distress that we turn to the unseemly spat between the Media Standards Trust and Sir Christopher Meyer, chairman of the Press Complaints Commission - 16th February
 * Carol... a victim of the age of the snitch'' - In any round-up of the Battle of Thatcher's Gob, a special mention in dispatches goes to The Times for sidestepping the lure of overkill on Friday with only the two pieces from non-white writers with personal insight as to why "golliwog" isn't as harmless as some insist - 9th February
 * the punchline and the joke's on you, Kelvin'' - Seemingly unconvinced by his boss Rebekah Wade's bullish Cudlipp Lecture (of which more below), Kelvin MacKenzie looks to diversify - 2nd February
 * everyone wants to buy British'' - The best of British to the Daily Mirror's drive to beat the slump by getting us all to Buy British - 19th January
 * as a war correspondent is plumbing the depths of journalism'' - In an enchantingly post-modern twist on Scoop, Joe the Plumber has been sent to Israel as a war correspondent by a conservative US web site - 13th January

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Articles: 2008

 * Ed couldn't do the jolly banter'' - As the aftershocks from the seismic Stourton sacking continue to reverberate, an old friend dons his hard hat and skips among the rubble to consider the role played by class warfare. In the Daily Telegraph, Simon Heffer declares that Ed Stourton's poshness had nothing to do with it - 22nd December 2008
 * can't applaud the all-singing Sark satire'' - Sometimes, all you can do is scratch your head at people's inexplicable distrust of those with their own best interests in mind - 15th December 2008 (see: Sark general election, 2008)
 * of the Bangalore Express'' - 8th December 2008
 * lunch, Moore licence fee please'' - 1st December 2008
 * press complaints gone mad!'' - 24th November 2008
 * this the end of the Fox-Palin affair?'' - 10th November 2008
 * Pugh, Lyons, McGrew...'' - 3rd November 2008
 * sermon from Murdoch's pulpit'' - 27th October 2008
 * me kangaroo down, Sir, our Rolf is as British as Elizabeth Windsor'' - 20th October 2008
 * vanishes if you look in the Mirror'' - 13th October 2008
 * of the Newsnight soothsayer'' - I am increasingly obsessed by the work of that sleek transatlantic focus groupie Frank Luntz - 6th October 2008
 * the muddled kingmaker'' - 29th September 2008
 * last stand – or Nolly's folly?'' - 22nd September 2008
 * Marr's sketchy Big Bang slot'' - 15th September 2008
 * Heffer's guide to sexism'' - 8th September 2008
 * the hounding of Glitter must stop'' - 1st September 2008
 * An Olympian exercise in patriotism'' - 25th August 2008
 * So, Arthur Daley is back. Dolly good show! - 21st July 2008
 * Those who live in Gaunt houses... - 14th July 2008
 * Noel, Noel ... a saviour is (re)born - 7th July 2008
 * Brave Dave prepares for the putsch to topple the junta - 30th June 2008
 * A base slur on the blessed Shami - 23rd June 2008
 * Sit back and enjoy the freakshow - 16th June 2008
 * Will Fox come out of its lair and go where 'The Sun' already shines? - 9th June 2008
 * Whose eco-disaster is it, anyway? - 2nd June 2008
 * Murdoch's stand for human rights - 26th May 2008
 * Campbell's chance for closure... - 19th May 2008
 * ‘This year's Scam award goes to...’ - 12th May 2008
 * There's no stopping theWall Street shuffle - 5th May 2008
 * With friends like Alastair Campbell... - 28th April 2008
 * The mystery migrant scaremongers - 21st April 2008
 * Let's hear more of Witty's repartee - 14th April 2008
 * Osama: the musical? You first, Ben - 7th April 2008
 * Alas, poor Kelvin, we feel your pain - 31st March 2008
 * A time for prayer and contemplation - 24th March 2008
 * What a Dickens of a scriptwriter! - 10th March 2008
 * 'Mail' and Mad Mel save the planet! - 3rd March 2008
 * Oscars could be silent movie awards - 14th January 2008

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Evening Standard:
Column name:

Remit/Info: Sport and sport business analysis

Section:

Role: Commentator

Pen-name:

Email:

Website: Standard.co / Matthew Norman

Commissioning editor:

Day published: Monday and Friday

Regularity: Twice-weekly

Column format:

Average length:

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Articles:

 * got it wrong but that doesn't warrant a kicking'' - If golf is a game of millimeters, golf captaincy also turns on the tiniest of margins - 22nd September 2008
 * time for Levy to earn his Spurs with a transfer of power'' - 19th September 2008
 * famous Faldo focus could spell defeat for laid-back Europeans'' - 15th September 2008
 * time to wake up after Fabio's night from heaven'' - 12th September 2008
 * Murray holds all the aces against Federer'' - 8th September 2008
 * has a lot to answer for as football loses its soul'' - 5th September 2008
 * race shows our sporting lot are off the pace'' - 1st September 2008
 * we go again . . . a new season brings yet more chaos at the Lane'' - it remains Groundhog Day at White Hart Lane, the repetitive cycle that spins the club like once gorgeous but now grey and tatty lingerie in a washing machine - 29th August 2008
 * time we gave golden girl Ohuruogu credit she deserves'' - 22nd August 2008
 * face it, Bolt has run his rivals into the ground'' - 18th August 2008
 * minority golds is no substitute for major triumphs'' - 15th August 2008
 * of Olympic addiction is bringing tears of joy to my eyes'' - 11th August 2008
 * Drinking from the Claret Jug won't be so sweet this year - 18th July 2008
 * They may be pariahs but I am rooting for Dwain and Max - 14th July 2008
 * Frank has to decide whether to follow his principles or the cash - 11th July 2008
 * Peerless pair put Borg and McEnroe heroics in the shade - 7th July 2008
 * Nadal can rampage his way to being the game's greatest - 4th July 2008
 * I'm sorry, Germany, but proper justice was served - 30th June 2008
 * Andy gets our hopes up so that means it's high time to panic - 27th June 2008
 * Golf needs Tiger like King Lear has to have a monarch - 20th June 2008
 * New superstars will lose their harmony with fans - 16th June 2008
 * Giving the 'loony one' a free rein would be the sane thing to do - 13th June 2008
 * King Fed may never rule again after this humbling demolition - 9th June 2008
 * Blatter's numbers add up in fight for future of our game - 2nd June 2008
 * Please let it be any nation but Germany for glory at Euro 2008 - 30th May 2008
 * Watching Terry's trauma was an intrusion too far - 23rd May 2008
 * Drogba can have the final word in Moscow and save Grant's job - 19th May 2008
 * Battle of the unlikely lads is FA Cup Final to savour - 16th May 2008
 * Hats-off to Ferguson and United for another vintage campaign - 12th May 2008
 * Boring old Wigan are the most influential team in the league - 9th May 2008
 * Now Blues belong on the world stage after a night of raw drama - 2nd May 2008
 * History is on side of Grant as Blues look set to see off raiders - 28th April 2008
 * Mediocrity reigns again as BBC hand Mac the mic - 25th April 2008
 * It's sink or swim for Avram Grant as Blues dive into Red Sea - 21st April 2008
 * Ashton's axemen win rugby award for worst of a rotten lot - 18th April 2008
 * Wenger's refusal to spend has proved so costly for Arsenal - 14th April 2008
 * Wenger's youth plan requires a splash of old spice - 11th April 2008
 * Shameful echoes in Lord Coe's defence of Olympic hypocrisy - 7th April 2008
 * It's over for Max now that he is the butt of our jokes - 4th April 2008
 * Give praise to a French president who is not frightened to face facts - 31st March 2008
 * Hollow England need more than Becks running on empty - 28th March 2008
 * Title race bets are off as trio hit final furlong in dead heat - 18th March 2008
 * Enjoy romantic journey back in time while it lasts - 10th March 2008
 * Ashton's schoolboy error teaches a sobering lesson - 7th March 2008
 * Chelsea's Mr Chips has to say goodbye now the fun is over - 3rd March 2008
 * Tyson v Holyfield: a freak show but we'd all watch it - 29th February 2008
 * Let us all hope Juande's new dawn is the real deal - 25th February 2008
 * Tragedy of two lost souls abandoned by the game - 22nd February 2008
 * Wenger is setting the tone for Arsenal's distasteful petulance - 18th February 2008
 * This BOA constrictor must not be allowed to crush all opposition - 11th February 2008
 * The 39th step is one too far for game that sold out years ago - 8th February 2008

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News & updates:
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References:
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Links:

 * The Spectator: articles